An “Only the Best” Approach to The Things You Keep

In March 2008, my wife’s grandmother passed away. In many ways, Irene was a hero to her. Kim respected her zest for life, her love for family, and her faith. In every way, Kim looked up to her.

When she died, Kim joined the rest of her family in taking home some memories from her apartment—two cardboard boxes full of memories.

When my wife returned home from the funeral, the boxes accompanied her. And like so many other items in our home, the boxes were placed on shelves in the basement where they would remain for the next several years, until we began our pursuit of minimalism.

Years later, I found myself on a call-in show for a Canadian radio station. The format consisted of a short introduction followed by 45 minutes of live questions from callers.

“How do I part with the objects in my home associated with memories?” The question arose early—it always does.

I made my usual case for decluttering sentimental items and how owning less of them brings more value to the ones we keep. I offered some helpful thoughts and tips to get started. The phone call ended and we moved to the next.

The next caller also wanted to talk about decluttering sentimental items and began by sharing her story of minimizing them. In one sentence, the caller summed up everything I had tried to say for the previous five minutes. It is a phrase I have repeated to others (and myself) countless times since that conversation.

“When it comes to minimizing items with sentimental memories attached,” she began, “my philosophy has been to adopt an ‘Only the Best’ strategy.”

She went on to explain, “We all have people and moments in life that we desire to remember. For each of them, I have tried to keep ‘only the one best’ item that represents each memory. When my grandmother died, rather than keeping an entire box of things from her home, I decided I wanted ‘only the best, most representative piece’.”

As she spoke, I remembered our own experience years earlier, decluttering the contents of the boxes Kim brought home from her grandmother’s house. Our process was the same—an intentional decision to keep “only the best.”

While Kim and I cleared our basement, we came across those boxes of memories. It was almost a shame to see such an important box of memories covered in dust, in the basement of our 4-level home.

Kim eventually selected three items from that box—the items she found to be most representative of her grandmother’s life.

She selected a candy dish that we placed in our living room. It now proudly offers a sweet snack to anyone who enters our living room—just like her grandma used to use it for. She selected a butterfly broach to pin on her jacket—just like grandma used to wear when she would visit. And she kept her grandmother’s Bible. It now resides in our nightstand—just like, you guessed it, where her grandmother used to keep it.

In keeping fewer sentimental items, we brought greater value to the memory of her grandmother. We use the items daily and are continually reminded of that special relationship. Because we sorted out “only the best,” her legacy lives on even stronger than before.

An only the best approach to possessions is beneficial, but can still be difficult, especially for people with particularly sentimental personalities. If that is the case, here are a few tips to help you along in the difficult process.

Four Steps to Help You Move Forward with an “Only the Best” Approach

Try one-half.

Less does not necessarily mean none. Paring down your sentimental items allows you to focus on the most meaningful. If this is difficult for you, but a step you know you need to take, try limiting your sentimental physical items to half their current amount. Rather than two boxes, keep one. These self-imposed boundaries often help us quickly realize which items mean the most.

Take pictures.

Digital clutter, if organized well, is less intrusive and burdensome than physical clutter. You may find relief in archiving digital photos of items before you remove them. Your memories are not stored in the object, the memories are in you. In that way, a photo can serve the same purpose as the physical object.

Give it life again.

Recently, some of my relatives removed an antique dining room table from their basement. It was the table they grew up around celebrating countless birthdays and holidays and special occasions. Nobody in the family could bear the thought of getting rid of it.

That was, until, a need arose in their local community. A friend of a friend was in need of a table and the difficult decision was made. The table would finally, ten years later, be given away. The receiver was blessed, the giver was blessed, and the table was given life again. If you are holding on to sentimental objects that could be used by you or someone else, honor their memory by giving them life again.

Remind yourself what brings meaning to your life.

Almost all of our sentimental possessions belong to one of three categories: relationships, experiences, or achievements. We hold on to these things because they remind us what brings joy and meaning into our life: the people around us, the experiences we share, and the accomplishments of growth and achievement.

Unfortunately, too often, the physical possessions we accumulate in our lives keep us from those very things as they burden us with unnecessary stress and care.

Lighten your load. Unburden your life. And go create more moments of relationship, adventure, and accomplishment.

You’ll never reach for anything new if you are too busy holding on to yesterday’s things. Keep only the best.