Building and Sustaining Positive Relationships

Connection with friends and business associates is critical to human existence. We need cheerleaders, encouragers, partners, helpers with whom we confide in, laugh with, work alongside, and share experiences. We need people we can trust. (Unsplash photo)

I recently attended Wild Deadwood Reads, a major author/reader event in Deadwood, South Dakota. This was the fourth installment of the summer event, but my first time attending. As an author, I enjoy meeting potential readers and other writers; I love to engage in conversations not just about my books, but what others enjoy reading and writing. The event was inspiring and fun; I intend to return in 2022 and hope to bring other Casper, Wyoming authors along as well.

Meeting writers and authors and learning about their works and processes helps me grow as a writer. I also make new friends, not just professionally, but sometimes on a more personal level. We discover what we have in common and often that leads to life-long friendships, not just because we share a love for writing, but we may discover other commonalities.

Taking part in a multi-author booksigning helps strengthen the bond between writers and can introduce us to new works, new ideas, and new pathways. (courtesy photo)

For example, a writer I met more than a decade ago at a booksigning in Montana remains a close friend today. Our mutual love for dogs, our common struggles as businesswomen (and as women in general), our enjoyment of nature and the outdoors, helped us quickly bond and remain close friends. She and I have shared booksignings when I’ve returned to central Montana; we have met for a long weekend writing retreat; and we’ve planned to attend writing conferences together. We are each other’s cheerleaders as we work on our respective books. I always look forward to seeing her whenever time permits.

Additionally, a high school friend remains a dear friend today, more than 40 years later. We rarely see each other as we live thousands of miles away. However, our emails and phone calls continue to keep us close, and we often talk of a reunion, especially as I look to make writing my fulltime occupation … and to travel her way one day.

Some friendships fade while others hold fast. Like a garden, relationships take time and nurturing.

As I write this, I’m preparing for my summer vacation, which includes two book events. I’ll be traveling throughout Montana; the first stop is Gallatin County and the Bozeman area. I’m visiting with friends I worked with and spent time with when I resided in the area during the late 1980s and early 1990s. I don’t see these people often, but whenever I return, there’s a group of about four women with whom I get in touch and try to see. These ladies were a big part of my life as a young, working woman, and now, 30 year later, we still enjoy spending time with one another, especially since we don’t see each but maybe once every two or three years.

I’m also participating in a book event which benefits an organization for whom I worked during my residency in Gallatin County. Although no one remains from my time there, I still feel a strong connection to that animal rescue and adoption organization, as two pets I adopted in those days came from that group. Additionally, two of my Pet Rescue Romance books are set in that region, a beautiful area that holds a special spot in my heart.

Bridger Mountain near Bozeman, Montana, a place I used to live.

Relationships are vital, not just professionally but personally. Humans need to be connected, and even if, as we grow older, we withdraw a bit more and cherish solitude time, there remains the need to connect. Whether I participate in a business/book event or visit someone I worked with 30 years ago or spend time with a childhood friend, connection with others is critical to my life; those relationships nourish me and help me grow, as a writer and as a human being.

As summer unfolds, I hope you have many opportunities to reconnect with people who are important to you. Who are some of those people? Whom haven’t you spent time with in a few years that you’d like see again?

I adopted these two animals, Sam, a cocker spaniel, and Ama, a longhaired orange tabby cat, from the Bozeman Humane Society in 1989 and 1990 respectively. They were my companions for many years; Ama lived to be nearly 18 years old. (Irwin photo)Pet Principle:

Loyalty is a lesson we can learn from our pets. Animals who are rescued and adopted, be they horses, cats, dogs, or another creature, seem especially loyal to their humans. The dog I adopted from what was known as the Bozeman Humane Society back in 1989 was my companion for ten years before he passed from cancer. He was my co-pilot when we traveled, my greeter when I returned home from work, and my comfort when sadness or sickness enveloped me. He also acted as my protector. I share a story about Sam in the Chicken Soup for the Soul book, I Can’t Believe My Dog Did That! I so appreciate the years we shared, and I’m grateful for the many moments with other rescued pets. Loyalty is a fading trait among humans; thankfully, we can still find devotion within our pets.

A story about my dog Sam is published in this Chicken Soup book, which is available from book retailers like Barnes & Noble and Amazon.