I’m Bisexual, and Coming Out Has Made Me Feel Free

After over a decade of hiding who I am, I’m happy to say I’m bisexual. That’s freeing to me.

I used to want to feel invisible. I’ve always been the weirdo, the outcast, and the shy, quiet one. I’m completely okay with this now. But a lot of myself has felt trapped, and I don’t want to hide who I am anymore.

After over a decade of hiding who I am, I’m happy to say I’m bisexual. Most of me was ashamed and afraid of feeling this way, but now I’m happy to come out. I’m still married and most likely always will be. I’m not interested in pursuing another romantic relationship, just wanting to feel free to be myself authentically.

Thank you to my husband for always loving me and always being the one I want to share my life with as a family. To the girl I kissed senior year of high school, I thank you. And thank you to one of my great friends for being open to first come out to you, and thank you for the courage to help me come out to those I love.

People have said you can’t be bi and be married to a man. Well, that’s a myth, and by hearing other bisexual women’s stories, I’m relieved to be both bisexual and married to a man. Even more so, I’m happy to be with a man who fully accepts my sexuality and one who I couldn’t imagine living this life without.

It’s okay to be black and bisexual. It’s okay to be married to a straight man and be bisexual. Bisexuality is valid, and I’m finally happy to be free to be me. I don’t know why I hesitated and pushed this part of me so far down for so long. Maybe it’s because I was raised in a Christian household and was afraid to be “banished to hell.” Maybe I felt wrong and in turmoil for being attracted to multiple genders. Maybe I wasn’t secure enough to be myself. Now I’m free to let all of that go.

I’m happy to have come out this Pride Month and even happier to have people I love to support and accept me for who I am. I’m a bisexual woman, I’m out, and now I’m truly free.

I’m Bisexual, and Coming Out Has Made Me Feel Free was originally published in CRY Magazine on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.