Mothers’ Day is not a day...

With Mothers’ Day in the rearview mirror for the next 360 odd days, I got to thinking. Mothers’ Day was the brainchild of a card company or a flower company or a telephone company to make money. Simple as that and I’m sure Google would point that out if I bothered to look. And because the company(s) didn’t make enough money by it being one day, now the conspiracy has expanded beyond the 24-hour celebration to be a weekend thing. It starts sometime on Friday really and expands to midnight on Sunday. Now other companies can and do take advantage of the Mothers Day free for all spending spree. It will soon be a week, I bet.

However, to fifty or more percent of the world, we know that Mothers’ Day is every single day from the time we set our heart upon that little human until our death. Even then I think we carry on in a different way. It starts with loving too fiercely and too tightly but all with the best intentions of loving someone through life, and then slowly letting the child become their own person and then letting go. But never fully letting go with our heart or our love, no matter what. That’s motherhood. That can’t be just a one-day thing, or a one-weekend thing. Mothers know this. But we’ll take a special day and make the companies rich and bring our families together and talk to our children.

There’s also a tiered system to motherhood. I got to the grandmother level a few years ago and boy am I learning lots. Now I get to love somebody, through loving somebody through life. Its like a favourite cake with icing all the time.

No matter what tier of motherhood I’m in, I’m still part of the village where one mother can rightly have the expectation for another mother or mother by proxy to help her love fiercely when she thinks she can’t love enough. To enfold her when she stumbles, to enfold her entire family, and to love them all through circling, and comforting, and guiding and again always with the best intentions.

Being human, sometimes mothers stray the course because it is long and hard and sometimes unforgiving. It's a journey that she undertakes with fear but always with love to do the best she can. Sometimes that means letting go early and letting the village love.

A mother knows there is no right way to be a mother. There is only the right love.

For those who are just starting the journey, know you have a village. Take advantage of the village, they’ll do right by you. You are not alone. You are not on a path that nobody has trod before. You are a mom! You have a village of moms to accompany you even when you might think it's just you. Reach out early and don’t be afraid.

Not everyone chooses this path. Not everyone wants this path. Not everyone is up for the challenge of this motherhood path and not everyone has the same opportunities or ways to get on this path. Some may have been on the traditional path for mere minutes. Some may have given up hope of getting there. Some may take it on unexpectedly or have it taken from them unexpectedly. Some co-path (double the mothering what a wicked gift for a child).

Motherhood is about doing the best you can even when love is all you have. There is nothing greater than that and nobody does it better than a MOTHER all year long.

This year, I’m going to try to be a better village for my children, my grandchildren, my nieces and nieces-in-law, and to anyone I see. It takes nothing to be kind with words and deeds but gives so much.

Don’t get me wrong, there is nothing wrong with treating your mother finer than your finest on Mothers’ Day. If it makes you feel good, she will be all about that.