Embracing the Crap
Sometimes a second draft feels more like an accident investigation. There are pieces exploded all over the place, and I have to fit them all back together to see what I was thinking in the first draft. It's not always pretty, but you learn something in the process that will help prevent it from ever happening again.
Patterns emerge, like obsessions with certain words or types of imagery, using the same phrasing over and over again, things like that. Many times it's on purpose. I use a lot of placeholders that get the idea across so I can move on, other times it can be a real WTF? moment when I have no idea what I was trying to say.
There is a lot of crap in there, too. I compared it to an accident investigation for a reason. But that's okay! It has to be okay. One of the things I had to learn in order to finish not only my first book, but to keep going and write more, is that I have to be comfortable with writing crap. Why? Because it's writing. The only people who can be perfectionists on their first drafts are people who have outlines so detailed they basically already written the book. That's not me. Otherwise it's important to get the words down, get the story down, figure out who your characters are and worry about the details later.
How many people out there have a bunch of beginnings sitting on their computer but no endings because they keep refining that opening chapter over and over? That used to be me, then I embraced the crap. I need the crap. The second and subsequent drafts are my favorites now for a reason; I like refining.
It's easy to get into the mindset that it's all garbage and I'm no good, though, so I have to be careful there, but the tweaking and the fixing is actually validating because there's something there, and I'm making it better.
Sometimes I find stuff that I forgot I wrote! It can be a great feeling to read something I wrote and have it feel brand new. Even better when it's good! There is a run of scenes in this new book that I adore already. They're done, as far as I'm concerned. (Until beta, when someone else sees it and goes 'Yeah, not so much.' But hey, I have them now, at least.)
So if you're struggling with getting the words down or thinking that what you're doing is crap, I say embrace that crap! It's your crap, and you can always make it better later. That's not putting things off! Sometimes you need perspective and/or context for things to click together.
But you can't finish the puzzle if you don't have all the pieces first.
Patterns emerge, like obsessions with certain words or types of imagery, using the same phrasing over and over again, things like that. Many times it's on purpose. I use a lot of placeholders that get the idea across so I can move on, other times it can be a real WTF? moment when I have no idea what I was trying to say.
There is a lot of crap in there, too. I compared it to an accident investigation for a reason. But that's okay! It has to be okay. One of the things I had to learn in order to finish not only my first book, but to keep going and write more, is that I have to be comfortable with writing crap. Why? Because it's writing. The only people who can be perfectionists on their first drafts are people who have outlines so detailed they basically already written the book. That's not me. Otherwise it's important to get the words down, get the story down, figure out who your characters are and worry about the details later.
How many people out there have a bunch of beginnings sitting on their computer but no endings because they keep refining that opening chapter over and over? That used to be me, then I embraced the crap. I need the crap. The second and subsequent drafts are my favorites now for a reason; I like refining.
It's easy to get into the mindset that it's all garbage and I'm no good, though, so I have to be careful there, but the tweaking and the fixing is actually validating because there's something there, and I'm making it better.
Sometimes I find stuff that I forgot I wrote! It can be a great feeling to read something I wrote and have it feel brand new. Even better when it's good! There is a run of scenes in this new book that I adore already. They're done, as far as I'm concerned. (Until beta, when someone else sees it and goes 'Yeah, not so much.' But hey, I have them now, at least.)
So if you're struggling with getting the words down or thinking that what you're doing is crap, I say embrace that crap! It's your crap, and you can always make it better later. That's not putting things off! Sometimes you need perspective and/or context for things to click together.
But you can't finish the puzzle if you don't have all the pieces first.
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