TO ALL THE DOGS I'VE LOVED
My favorite dog I've ever had is Girlfriend. I've come to learn that your love-meter with an pet is kind of a mutual thing. Girlfriend is 75% French Bulldog, 12.5 Pug and 12.5 Boston Terrier, and 100% super-freak. She's the craziest, funniest, most unpredictable dog I've ever known. They say dogs emulate their owners, so I don't know what that says about me.
She is so jealous that you have to call the other dog to get her to come flying into the room. She's addicted to Nicorette, attacks vacuum cleaners, and weed eaters. She loves to play, and pees in paper plates then puts herself in time-out. And she LOVES to watch TV, especially dramas late at night. A couple of years ago, it was just me and her awake, and we were watching that super serious movie, Still Alice, with Julianne Moore. It's about Alzheimer's. I was almost in tears, and Girlfriend turned around and looked at me like — can you believe this shit?
She's codependent (maybe I should say we're codependent.) She's like a little armrest right up under me every night. She loves me more than any dog I've ever had. When we went to Europe for two weeks, she got stress-induced gastritis.
Then there is Batman— he's a black pug with a weight problem. He's always looking at you like he's trying to crack a safe. All he cares about is food and Girlfriend. But he's the most eternally optimistic dog I have ever seen. If you get up to go to the kitchen or the bathroom, or anywhere else, he follows just in case you might give him a piece of food. It usually works.
We lost our other dog Tina last year. She was a loner, unbelievably loyal, and kind of like an angel on earth. She didn't give much affection or want it and never fully trusted people after her first owner. The note with her at the Humane Society said "possible abuse, and that she was abandoned there because she was barking at chickens." Duh, isn't that what dogs do bark at birds.
Tina had short hair and looked like a normal dog when we got her, but within six months, she looked like the Big white creature from the movie-- The NeverEnding Story. People would say, "Dude, that's the biggest dog I've ever seen," or "That dog looks like a cartoon." We never figured out what breed she was. But she was the best guard dog ever. She patrolled the yard and kept the coyotes at bay. She sat in the sun next to the swing set and watched our daughter Lola every time she went outside.
We've also had dogs that were a little screwed up. When our boys were little, we got an Airdale Terrier, and I told our five-year-old son, Levi, he could name the dog. He jumped up and said, "Universal Studios!" Since I couldn't really see myself standing in the yard, shouting Universal Studios every day, I told Levi we'd go get ice cream if he picked a different name. So he settled on Harry Potter.
Harry was mental from the get-go. He probably did $10,000 worth of damage in his lifetime. He tore up pool floats, furniture and bit a hole in a gigantic bouncy house we rented right before my son Oscar's fourth birthday party. He ate everything too —including a whole 100 count box of Nicorette.
One day we were in the studio writing a song when one of our co-writers looked out the window and said - "Is your dog suppose to have that?" Chris and I looked out the French doors and saw Harry standing there with a full smoked turkey in his mouth. "Oh my God!" I flew outside, Chris right behind me. Harry made sure we saw it, then he took off running. We thought he had stolen it off the neighbors dining room table. Later that day, we found the ripped package on the porch that read "Happy Holiday's" from our accountant. From then on, every year, he found the turkey first.
There have been so many dogs I loved throughout my life — Harper, Benji, Jasper, and Rosie, my little copper Pomeranian. She lived with me in basement apartments when I was broke. Then I got her a friend- Gus. He was a Brussels Griffon, and Rosie was his world. She was killed by a coyote, and it was heartbreaking. After she died, Gus mourned her so much that he moved across the street. The neighbors had a Beagle mix and a dog door, and we just couldn't keep him here.
https://vimeo.com/498482738
She is so jealous that you have to call the other dog to get her to come flying into the room. She's addicted to Nicorette, attacks vacuum cleaners, and weed eaters. She loves to play, and pees in paper plates then puts herself in time-out. And she LOVES to watch TV, especially dramas late at night. A couple of years ago, it was just me and her awake, and we were watching that super serious movie, Still Alice, with Julianne Moore. It's about Alzheimer's. I was almost in tears, and Girlfriend turned around and looked at me like — can you believe this shit?
She's codependent (maybe I should say we're codependent.) She's like a little armrest right up under me every night. She loves me more than any dog I've ever had. When we went to Europe for two weeks, she got stress-induced gastritis.
Then there is Batman— he's a black pug with a weight problem. He's always looking at you like he's trying to crack a safe. All he cares about is food and Girlfriend. But he's the most eternally optimistic dog I have ever seen. If you get up to go to the kitchen or the bathroom, or anywhere else, he follows just in case you might give him a piece of food. It usually works.
We lost our other dog Tina last year. She was a loner, unbelievably loyal, and kind of like an angel on earth. She didn't give much affection or want it and never fully trusted people after her first owner. The note with her at the Humane Society said "possible abuse, and that she was abandoned there because she was barking at chickens." Duh, isn't that what dogs do bark at birds.
Tina had short hair and looked like a normal dog when we got her, but within six months, she looked like the Big white creature from the movie-- The NeverEnding Story. People would say, "Dude, that's the biggest dog I've ever seen," or "That dog looks like a cartoon." We never figured out what breed she was. But she was the best guard dog ever. She patrolled the yard and kept the coyotes at bay. She sat in the sun next to the swing set and watched our daughter Lola every time she went outside.
We've also had dogs that were a little screwed up. When our boys were little, we got an Airdale Terrier, and I told our five-year-old son, Levi, he could name the dog. He jumped up and said, "Universal Studios!" Since I couldn't really see myself standing in the yard, shouting Universal Studios every day, I told Levi we'd go get ice cream if he picked a different name. So he settled on Harry Potter.
Harry was mental from the get-go. He probably did $10,000 worth of damage in his lifetime. He tore up pool floats, furniture and bit a hole in a gigantic bouncy house we rented right before my son Oscar's fourth birthday party. He ate everything too —including a whole 100 count box of Nicorette.
One day we were in the studio writing a song when one of our co-writers looked out the window and said - "Is your dog suppose to have that?" Chris and I looked out the French doors and saw Harry standing there with a full smoked turkey in his mouth. "Oh my God!" I flew outside, Chris right behind me. Harry made sure we saw it, then he took off running. We thought he had stolen it off the neighbors dining room table. Later that day, we found the ripped package on the porch that read "Happy Holiday's" from our accountant. From then on, every year, he found the turkey first.
There have been so many dogs I loved throughout my life — Harper, Benji, Jasper, and Rosie, my little copper Pomeranian. She lived with me in basement apartments when I was broke. Then I got her a friend- Gus. He was a Brussels Griffon, and Rosie was his world. She was killed by a coyote, and it was heartbreaking. After she died, Gus mourned her so much that he moved across the street. The neighbors had a Beagle mix and a dog door, and we just couldn't keep him here.
https://vimeo.com/498482738
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