Recognizing We’re Afraid … and Choosing to Do What Needs to be Done Anyway
@bethvogt
I had a dental appointment yesterday.
I dreaded it so much I’d put it off for five months.
But yesterday, I “adulted” and went to the dentist.
A lot of people are afraid of the dentist – maybe you’re one of them. If you are, I empathize with you. You’re welcome to share your story in the comments. I label myself a “dental disaster waiting to happen” – ha ha – but the reality of my dental dramas through the years are all too true.
What made yesterday’s appointment all the more difficult is that my longtime, trusted dentist died several months ago. He took care of me and my family, so yesterday’s long-avoided visit was a snarled knot of grief and anxiety.
There were decades that I survived myriads of dental procedures with false bravado and lots of humor. No one ever knew I was afraid.
Until one particularly rough procedure where I sat in the chair wearing one of those paper bibs and broke down sobbing. My trusted dentist and good friend sat beside me until I calmed down and then asked, “What is going on?”
I explained how my history of abuse affected me during dental exams. NOTE: Medical providers need to know about abuse because of how it can play out during exams and procedures. But it’s often difficult to share with someone in the medical community if we don’t know them well – and even when we do.
My dentist listened and then said, “Beth, you don’t have to pretend like you’re okay. I’ll help you now and take care of you in the future.”
From then on, we took certain steps to handle my anxiety, instead of pretending it didn’t exist. This included my husband sitting with me during all procedures, from cleanings to crowns.
No one should skip going to the dentist. With my troublesome dental history, where minor issues often snowball into more complicated problems, I certainly shouldn’t.
One time, my dentist asked his staff to stay late because the work he needed to do became more extensive. Another time, he joked that Rob needed to hide my passport between one appointment and the next because I was a flight risk.
I always came back because of the trust we’d established over the years. My dentist knew my story, understood my fear, and he didn’t make me feel ashamed.
I went to the dentist yesterday because my friend would want me to take care of my teeth even though he can’t do it anymore. By keeping that appointment, I honored all those long hours in the chair when he took care of me. He always did the right thing, got me through my fears, because he was a wonderful, compassionate dentist who took care of me, the same way he took care of all his patients.
It’s amazing how someone else’s compassion toward us can help us be brave, isn’t it?
Recognizing We're Afraid ... and Choosing to Do What Needs to be Done Anyway https://bit.ly/3sksWVS #perspective #encouragement
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'One of the greatest discoveries a man makes, one of his great surprises, is to find he can do what he was afraid he couldn't do.' Quote by Henry Ford https://bit.ly/3sksWVS #overcomingfear #courage
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