SNL-ing a Christian book.
(It's guest post Friday! When I wrote the book Quitter, my editor removed an entire chapter. I was crushed at first until he explained why. He said, "You're just repeating yourself. The ideas in this chapter aren't new and it reads like filler." And he was right. So when Ken Edwards submitted this guest post, I knew I had to share because as a writer, I'm guilty of thinking this way sometimes. And, you've probably read a book exactly like the ones Ken is about to describe. If you want to write a guest post for SCL, here's how!)
SNL-ing a Christian book. By Ken Edwards
The thing that's always frustrated me about Saturday Night Live is that the show is about 40% too long. It's usually funny from 11:30 until maybe 12:15 or 12:20, but then almost all of what happens from there up until 1 am isn't even remotely funny. And I've wondered for the last 25 years, why don't they just sign off at 12:30 and be done with it?
It would be really easy to do. Instead of 5-minute sketches, make them 3. The first 3 are usually funny, but then they just drag on for seemingly no reason. Why not get in there, hit the punch line, make your point, then bow out gracefully?
I wonder the same thing about most Christian books. It seems that they are all—well, at least the ones I've read—about 40% too long. In a 200-page Christian book, the author has pretty much exhaustively made his/her point by page 140.
And sometimes I can actually see it. I'm nearing the end of Chapter 9. There was a thought-provoking foreword by some famous author/speaker/preacher. The biblical justification for the author's point has been made. It has been backed up by detailed life stories, illustrations and examples. There have been a few solid object lessons using farm animals. The condition of my heart has been effectively compared to how some type of machinery works. The author has cleverly sprinkled name-droppings throughout his prose. I've done justice to all the supplementary study/discussion questions.
And I see it. All we need is the last piece of tape and the ribbon on this bountiful gift of truth and wisdom. Just pull this thing into the garage and shut 'er down. Roll the credits. Let the clock run out. Blow the 5 o'clock whistle. This baby is over. But then…but then…
Chapter 10.
Noooooo!!!!! I utter a painful scream akin to when I accidentally bump my bad knee against the coffee table in the middle of the night on the way to the fridge. And so it continues. Not just through Chapter 10, but all the way to Chapter 17!
Are you kidding me? And now I'm in a quandary. I got the point. I have several quotes I can spew out at my next small group. I should just put this thing down and walk away.
But I can't. What if in the ensuing chapters of rehash, and rehash of the rehash, and rehash of the rehash of the rehash, there's some buried nugget of life-changing truth? After a few more chapters of what surely was the result of a copy-paste-fest, what if the author goes, "Oh, gosh, I almost left out the most important point in this entire book."
Cut me some slack! I'm a slow reader anyway. I was never hooked on any phonics. I'm not one of these super readers who can finish an entire hard-cover John Grisham book in one afternoon at the beach. I haven't read every hip and relevant book on the planet cover to cover. But I probably would have if they'd taken the final curtain call a few chapters earlier.
And then I find myself in conversations like this…
Super-Hip-And-Relevant-Christian-Reader: "Hey, have you read 'The You-Me Principle'?"
Me: "No, I've heard about it, but I haven't gotten around to reading it." (OK, that's a lie. I've never heard of it.)
S.H.A.R.C.R.: "What! You haven't read 'The You-Me Principle'? I thought everyone who had any kind of worthwhile relationship with Jesus had read 'The You-Me Principle'."
Me: "Well, uh, no, I haven't read it."
S.H.A.R.C.R.: "How are you able to even function in a world of self-aggrandizing egomaniacs without having read 'The You-Me Principle'?"
Me: "I don't know, but I seem to be making it so far. So, how far into the book are you?"
S.H.A.R.C.R.: "I don't know. Maybe 60%."
Me: "Well then you can save me a lot of frustration and heartache by just telling me everything there is to know about it, because you're effectively done."
Listen, my mom never walked in after a delicious and filling 3-course family dinner with another pot roast. We came, we ate, maybe we belched a little, then we just walked away from the table.
Can we just go with less rehash and maybe some more pictures if you need filler? And could we go with a one-hour SNL?
Question:
What's a Christian book you read that felt too short? Let's not fill up the comments with books that were too long. Instead, what's a book that was so good, you were sad when it was over?
