The Fiver | Fans are back! But avoid using toilets during peak times

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If nothing else, the last few months have proved conclusively that the old adage “football without fans is nothing” is bull, tish, pish, balls, balderdash, piffle, waffle, yap and mummery. True, football without fans is not very good. But imagine what the last nine Covid-infused months would have been like without any football at all. The Fiver can only speak for itself, but we’d either be in prison, a gutter or rehab. Or on the run. Or maybe we’d have used the time spent watching the likes of Leicester v Fulham at 5pm on a weekday to learn a new language, or get round to reading Finnegans Wake, or whatever it is you haven’t done either. Leicester v Fulham is better, though, isn’t it?

Related: Returning football fans to be allowed alcohol without a meal in stadiums

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