Have you gone through a divorce? It sucks. But I think I found a formula to help.
I would like to tell you there is an easy way to get through a divorce. There's not. Even with mine, which was the best decision I had made in years, it still sucked.
I have a good friend who is currently right smack in the middle of what is proving to be a very messy and ugly separation. It's painful. It's intense. And good lord the details of information she has to sort through is never ending. Sound familiar?
What I've realized while watching her process, though, is that she's done one very important thing that has given her the support she needs to make it through this hard time as in tact as possible—she's surrounded herself with several different types of women who play very different roles.
Why is this important? Because her emotions are everywhere and on different days she needs different responses. She has gathered five different types of friend that I highly recommend everyone have:
1-The "mothering" friend: This friend immediately opened her home for an impromptu trip, where she wrapped her in a blanket, gave her tea, and did things like make her shower and talk a walk. It was gentle. It was nurturing. And it gave my friend a place to rest.
2-The empathetic friend: This friend responds to group messages with things like, "Oh honey, I'm so sorry. You are so loved!" She always gives good hugs and will watch cheesy movies and eat ice cream with you with hours.
3-The feeding friend: This friend shows up at your house with food because she knows you aren't eating. Sometimes she's a coworker who forces you to eat tater tots that she picked up on her lunch break. Sometimes she drops off a meal at your house. Sometimes she takes you to dinner. Whatever her method, she's watching you like a hawk and making sure you have calories to energy your body.
4-The impulsive friend: This friend is more than willing to make poor choices with you. She has no beef sharing in your victory when you end up with child support and alimony, and sends you gifs reminding you to "channel your inner Angela Bassett a la Waiting to Exhale! Light his shit on fire!!" (This is totally me. I love that gif)
5-The logical friend: She says things like, "No. Do not light his things on fire. Your goal is to look like the better person in court. Screw him in front of the judge. The damage is more lasting." She talks you through the logical steps and details you need to consider at every stage. And for the record, she's right about the fire. Don't do that.
Listen, no matter how you slice it, divorce sucks all the way around. It's painful and time consuming. However, from one woman who survived hers almost 5 years ago, I can promise you, you will heal. You will also learn a lot about yourself and what you are and are not willing to settle for next time. But you will come through it on the other side. And to be perfectly honest, being single kind of rocks sometimes.
Stay strong my friends. And find yourself those five kinds of women. It'll be worth it.
~
Did you see the news?? Sara Ney and I are BACK with a brand new holiday romantic comedy! New Year's Steve is coming to a Kindle near you December 15! Check it out:
In the game of Online Dating, names can be deceiving…
CEO Harrison Steven McGinnis is incognito. Better to use a fake name while online dating when money, connections, and his famous company are on the line.
To save himself from the gold diggers of the world, he hides his face and changes his name to Steve, and still manages to make an amazing connection with a woman named Felicity.
New Year? New boyfriend?
Accountant Felicity Thompson is working late. Committed to meeting her year-end goal, she isn’t leaving her desk until the job is done. Her reward? A date with Steve.
If only the light above her desk would stop flashing, and the run-in with the mega-hot maintenance man would stop making her squirm in her desk chair.
Suddenly, work is taking longer to finish and her date with Steve? Doesn’t feel so exciting. Not when she can’t get her mind off of Harry.
Can her New Year’s Eve be saved?
And who will be waiting for her when the ball drops at mid night?
You guys don't want to miss this. Preorder it today!
Amazon US: https://amzn.to/3lrVZ5Y
Amazon Universal: https://books2read.com/NewYearsSteve
~
As if that isn't enough, Kissmas Eve has a new cover!
We love how it turned out.
If you haven't read Kissmas Eve yet, it's available now on Amazon and through Kindle Unlimited! Check it out and get in the holiday mood!
Amazon US: https://amzn.to/3lylen4
Amazon Universal: mybook.to/KissmasEve
I have a good friend who is currently right smack in the middle of what is proving to be a very messy and ugly separation. It's painful. It's intense. And good lord the details of information she has to sort through is never ending. Sound familiar?
What I've realized while watching her process, though, is that she's done one very important thing that has given her the support she needs to make it through this hard time as in tact as possible—she's surrounded herself with several different types of women who play very different roles.
Why is this important? Because her emotions are everywhere and on different days she needs different responses. She has gathered five different types of friend that I highly recommend everyone have:
1-The "mothering" friend: This friend immediately opened her home for an impromptu trip, where she wrapped her in a blanket, gave her tea, and did things like make her shower and talk a walk. It was gentle. It was nurturing. And it gave my friend a place to rest.
2-The empathetic friend: This friend responds to group messages with things like, "Oh honey, I'm so sorry. You are so loved!" She always gives good hugs and will watch cheesy movies and eat ice cream with you with hours.
3-The feeding friend: This friend shows up at your house with food because she knows you aren't eating. Sometimes she's a coworker who forces you to eat tater tots that she picked up on her lunch break. Sometimes she drops off a meal at your house. Sometimes she takes you to dinner. Whatever her method, she's watching you like a hawk and making sure you have calories to energy your body.
4-The impulsive friend: This friend is more than willing to make poor choices with you. She has no beef sharing in your victory when you end up with child support and alimony, and sends you gifs reminding you to "channel your inner Angela Bassett a la Waiting to Exhale! Light his shit on fire!!" (This is totally me. I love that gif)
5-The logical friend: She says things like, "No. Do not light his things on fire. Your goal is to look like the better person in court. Screw him in front of the judge. The damage is more lasting." She talks you through the logical steps and details you need to consider at every stage. And for the record, she's right about the fire. Don't do that.
Listen, no matter how you slice it, divorce sucks all the way around. It's painful and time consuming. However, from one woman who survived hers almost 5 years ago, I can promise you, you will heal. You will also learn a lot about yourself and what you are and are not willing to settle for next time. But you will come through it on the other side. And to be perfectly honest, being single kind of rocks sometimes.
Stay strong my friends. And find yourself those five kinds of women. It'll be worth it.
~
Did you see the news?? Sara Ney and I are BACK with a brand new holiday romantic comedy! New Year's Steve is coming to a Kindle near you December 15! Check it out:
In the game of Online Dating, names can be deceiving…
CEO Harrison Steven McGinnis is incognito. Better to use a fake name while online dating when money, connections, and his famous company are on the line.
To save himself from the gold diggers of the world, he hides his face and changes his name to Steve, and still manages to make an amazing connection with a woman named Felicity.
New Year? New boyfriend?
Accountant Felicity Thompson is working late. Committed to meeting her year-end goal, she isn’t leaving her desk until the job is done. Her reward? A date with Steve.
If only the light above her desk would stop flashing, and the run-in with the mega-hot maintenance man would stop making her squirm in her desk chair.
Suddenly, work is taking longer to finish and her date with Steve? Doesn’t feel so exciting. Not when she can’t get her mind off of Harry.
Can her New Year’s Eve be saved?
And who will be waiting for her when the ball drops at mid night?
You guys don't want to miss this. Preorder it today!
Amazon US: https://amzn.to/3lrVZ5Y
Amazon Universal: https://books2read.com/NewYearsSteve
~
As if that isn't enough, Kissmas Eve has a new cover!
We love how it turned out.
If you haven't read Kissmas Eve yet, it's available now on Amazon and through Kindle Unlimited! Check it out and get in the holiday mood!
Amazon US: https://amzn.to/3lylen4
Amazon Universal: mybook.to/KissmasEve
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