I’m not Catholic. This might mean that I don’t have an insider’s understanding of how any of the pope’s words affect his followers. But also it might mean that as an outsider, I can see more objectively what effect those words have.
In a recent documentary, Pope Francis said he supports civil unions for same-sex couples. He also said, "Homosexuals have a right to be a part of the family."
Sounds good, right? Let’s see what affect it has on the people most affected by it.
Civil Union vs. Marriage
I’ve heard from many people who are excited about this statement. They say, “This could mean the Catholic church will allow adoption by gay couples!” or "This could change employment practices at Catholic hospitals!" or "This could change the dynamics of families with gay children!”
Yeah, I suppose it could. But will it? Or will individual diocese, bishops, and priests continue to follow the dogma they’ve always followed: that homosexuality is a sin and must be condemned? Why should they change? No one has instructed them to do anything different from what they’ve always done.
How likely is it that heterosexual Catholics would be happy being allowed a civil union but not a marriage? Answer: Not at all. So what, then, is the offer of a civil union without marriage? Isn’t it confirmation that queer Catholics are not “part of the family” but are, instead, still on the outside peering through dark stained glass windows? And, after all, Pope Frances has no authority over civil law.
Part of a Pattern
“Oh,” I hear some excited Catholics say, “he said this before, a couple of years ago, but the Vatican censored the statement. So now that they’ve let it stay in the documentary, this signals a huge change in their thinking!”
Is change, in fact, signaled? Maybe. But how huge is it? To me it looks huge only by virtue of the bar being so low to begin with.
Then I hear, “What about the apology he offered to gays and lots of other people?”
“What apology?” I ask. “To whom did he say it?” Answer: He said it to a bunch of reporters. In 2016. So—where is it? Has he actually apologized to anyone? What has he instructed Catholics to do?
Among other things, Catholicism asks of its members that they confess sins, offer repentance, gain absolution, and then actually repent—that is, change their ways. That statement on the plane amounted to nothing more than a pale, generalized confession. Because what, exactly, is he apologizing for, and what will he do to change things?
He’s famous for saying it’s not his job to judge gay people. But doesn’t he still expect God to do so?
He does say that the church must ask forgiveness for this mistreatment. Whether he got that forgiveness, I don’t know. But I know this: There has been no repentance.
Moving the Church Forward Slowly
Now I hear, “Pope Francis knows the church doesn’t change quickly.”
Based on its history, clearly the Catholic church takes the long view. A helpful image might be that of turning a barge in a canal. But people don’t live for centuries. People seldom live for one century. And for most of that potential century, queer Catholics suffer either isolation and/or condemnation or they suffer tolerance. You don’t think tolerance is suffering? Would you want to be “tolerated?”
Even with this latest statement, queer Catholics are denied full entry into “the family,” and—even if civil unions become common among this group—the isolation will continue. At this snail’s pace, tolerance (if that even comes) will be all they get in their lifetimes, perhaps their children’s lifetimes, perhaps their grandchildren’s lifetimes. And—really—haven’t they waited long enough?
Just Another Pebble
Pope Francis has shown himself to be a sweet, loving man, full of Christian goodwill. No argument there. He seems fond of dropping these sentimental pebbles behind him, perhaps in the hope that the church itself will soften. But he has not shown himself to be a man of action.
He is the pope, the earthly representative of the Catholic God, and (supposedly) his authority comes from there. He is the leader of the Catholic church. Where is his leadership? Why has he not done more than drop pebbles? Why is the extent of his “apology” nothing more than a trail of sweet words?
Is he waiting to see if the pebbles land in ponds and send ripples out across the water? If so, it means he’s willing to see people drown in the meantime.