Things I'm Glad I Didn't Say to Ron Perlman

Heads up: two big events in February!


Things I'm Glad I Didn't Say to Ron Perlman When I Saw Him Walking His Dog in the West Village

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"Hellboyyyyyyye!"
- - - -
"Are they making a Hellboy 3?"
- - - -
"Do you want me to throw that baggie away for you?"
- - - -
"Wow, you're smaller in person."
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"You and David Attenborough are my two biggest man-crushes right now."

- - - -
"I have this thing I've been working on?"
- - - -
"I kind of thought your dog would be bigger."
- - - -
"Are you going to see Beauty and the Beast in 3D? Because you were in that Beauty and the Beast TV show? Remember?"


- - - -
[fist-bump]
- - - -
"Pardon me, do you know where Ground Zero is?"
- - - -
"'Well, like my daddy said right before he killed my mom: if you want anything done right, you gotta do it yourself.' From Blade 2? Remember?"


- - - -
"Oh can my wife please take a picture of us please?"
- - - -
"I love your work."
- - - -
"Do you follow Kurt Sutter's Twitter?"
- - - -
"Love you, man." (I did actually say this.)



Literary Death Match LA, Ep. 6!



I'm honored to compete in long-running global phenomenon Literary Death Match on Wednesday, February 22nd at 8:15pm in Los Angeles.

The crowd IS a factor in these competitive reading events so please come and support if you are in the area! From the site:

The evening will feature a fierce foursome of scribes, including Ned Vizzini (author of It's Kind of a Funny Story and Be More Chill), Steve Abee (author of the upcoming Johnny Future and The Bus: Cosmic Ejaculations of The Daily Mind in Transit), short-fictionist Antonia Crane (representing SLAKE journal) and debut novelist Michelle Haimoff (author of These Days Are Ours).

This event is open to the public. Advance tickets available here for $7 ($10 at the door). Be there!

Location: Busby's East, 5364 Wilshire Boulevard Los Angeles, CA 90036

Barnes & Noble Teen Writing Workshop



The B&N Teen Writing Workshop meets on the last Friday of the month to address a specific writing skill (e.g. "dialogue," "the anti-hero") through discussion and writing prompts.

Our second workshop of 2012 takes place Friday, February 24th at 5:00pm in Glendale, CA.

This is a FREE event open to middle- and high-school students. Barnes & Noble will provide refreshments. Student work will be featured on the online journal Give Us Money.

Location: 210 Americana Way (2nd floor event area), Glendale, CA 91210