Forgiveness
Forgiveness is interesting.
Because I forgive you doesn't mean that I need to trust you.
One lying SOB in particular, who I've blocked and muted, apologized for the one behavior I didn't care about, but didn't seem to think his slander and libel of honest, genuine people was worth apologizing for. And this prick has lied about me. He's lied about friends of mine. He's lied about people who actually helped prop him up and aided him along the way.
In fact, said lying sack of crap didn't acknowledge that he is a liar. So, technically, his apology itself is untrustworthy.
Despite having my email and my phone number, he has harassed my wife, my fans, my friends, and my followers, whining to anyone who will listen that I'm being mean to him by blocking him.
Some people don't seem to understand that they are blocked for their protection. If I have blocked you, I avoid temptation to hurl rocks. If I work hard to forget you, I can't wish you harm, or spend time disemboweling you.
Besides, I've learned my lesson once already.
Many, many moons ago, I had a lady friend who needed me to pick her from from a police precinct. She'd been arrested for shop lifting. Even though she'd told me she'd shoplifted before, this time she was supposedly set up by an acquaintance.
It was a lie, of course. I was stupid enough to believe that I was special. That she wouldn't lie to me. Or if she did, she'd retract it soon enough. It took her three days, and by then, I figured she'd been honest with me about having been set up.
I cut her off. Angrily. Loudly. Over the phone.
Four months later, I forgave her.
The mistake I made was associating with her again afterwards. Just to hang out and talk, just like before.
Why a mistake? Six months later, she drugged me. With something to make me loosen up so I would finally sleep with her-- a goal she'd been trying to attain for the previous five years.
We won't go into the lies she told after that in an attempt to tie me to her further.
So now, when a lying prick complains to anyone who will listen about how mean I'm being to him, because I "won't forgive him," he misunderstands.
Forgiveness doesn't mean I get to be used as a prop in someone else's sideshow. Forgiveness doesn't mean I get to put up with your BS on a daily basis so I can be aggravated for your entertainment.
Forgiveness does not mean that I trust you. I especially cannot trust a proven liar. When I see what they will lie about -- WHO they will lie about -- trust is gone. Poof. It's never coming back.
In this particular instance, it's hard to figure out what I hate about this jerk more: that he lied about me, or that he lied about my friends.
It's a cliche, but broken trust doesn't get fixed. Especially when one thinks its funny to burn bridges with your friends and allies are still on it.
At the end of the day, I've learned my lesson. I forgive, but never forget.
Because I forgive you doesn't mean that I need to trust you.
One lying SOB in particular, who I've blocked and muted, apologized for the one behavior I didn't care about, but didn't seem to think his slander and libel of honest, genuine people was worth apologizing for. And this prick has lied about me. He's lied about friends of mine. He's lied about people who actually helped prop him up and aided him along the way.
In fact, said lying sack of crap didn't acknowledge that he is a liar. So, technically, his apology itself is untrustworthy.
Despite having my email and my phone number, he has harassed my wife, my fans, my friends, and my followers, whining to anyone who will listen that I'm being mean to him by blocking him.
Some people don't seem to understand that they are blocked for their protection. If I have blocked you, I avoid temptation to hurl rocks. If I work hard to forget you, I can't wish you harm, or spend time disemboweling you.
Besides, I've learned my lesson once already.
Many, many moons ago, I had a lady friend who needed me to pick her from from a police precinct. She'd been arrested for shop lifting. Even though she'd told me she'd shoplifted before, this time she was supposedly set up by an acquaintance.
It was a lie, of course. I was stupid enough to believe that I was special. That she wouldn't lie to me. Or if she did, she'd retract it soon enough. It took her three days, and by then, I figured she'd been honest with me about having been set up.
I cut her off. Angrily. Loudly. Over the phone.
Four months later, I forgave her.
The mistake I made was associating with her again afterwards. Just to hang out and talk, just like before.
Why a mistake? Six months later, she drugged me. With something to make me loosen up so I would finally sleep with her-- a goal she'd been trying to attain for the previous five years.
We won't go into the lies she told after that in an attempt to tie me to her further.
So now, when a lying prick complains to anyone who will listen about how mean I'm being to him, because I "won't forgive him," he misunderstands.
Forgiveness doesn't mean I get to be used as a prop in someone else's sideshow. Forgiveness doesn't mean I get to put up with your BS on a daily basis so I can be aggravated for your entertainment.
Forgiveness does not mean that I trust you. I especially cannot trust a proven liar. When I see what they will lie about -- WHO they will lie about -- trust is gone. Poof. It's never coming back.
In this particular instance, it's hard to figure out what I hate about this jerk more: that he lied about me, or that he lied about my friends.
It's a cliche, but broken trust doesn't get fixed. Especially when one thinks its funny to burn bridges with your friends and allies are still on it.
At the end of the day, I've learned my lesson. I forgive, but never forget.
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There’s a difference between forgiveness and restoration of a relationship. Forgiveness happens by the injured person. Restoration comes from the one who caused the injury. Step 1 they have to acknowledge what they’ve done and that it was wrong. Step 2 is they have to show repentance. True regret for their actions. Step 3 is changing their behavior. This takes time and effort. Most people will not do this. The injured person still has a choice to accept and restore the relationship or not at this point.
You are correct in staying away from this person. Some Christians incorrectly will tell you that you haven’t truly forgiven someone if you don’t restore your relationship. Don’t let them make you feel guilty.
In my experience, forgiveness takes time and prayer for God to change your heart to let go of the anger and resentment.
I’m sorry for the pain peoples’ betrayal have caused you. When people hurt me, I think about how I’ve hurt God by my behavior and it makes me so grateful that He still loves me and wants me.
Keep the faith, don’t let the turkeys get you down and bask in God’s love.
I enjoy your books and your blog. Thank you for using your talent to entertain, make us think about God and make our days brighter.