Somewhere Out There

          "Somewhere Out There" By Allison Bruning   
          When I was little, I use to dream about the day I wouldreunite with my older brother. In 1986, a year after my father lost his battleto lung cancer, the song "Somewhere Out There" appeared in the movie An American Tail. In the movie Fievaland sister, Tanya, are separated. They sing the song together looking up at themoon dreaming of the day they would be reunited. Every time I heard the song, Idreamt Eric and I was staring up at the same moon dreaming of each other.  I would crank up the volume and sing my littleheart out with the dreams of my older brother.  
              Ericand I were born twenty years apart almost to the day.  I was born January 22, 1976 in Cleveland,Ohio. Eric's mother died in 1979 and a year later our father married my mother.When I was four years old, my parents and I went to dad's WWII reunion in NewJersey. There dad reunited with Eric for a brief moment and told him he had asister. I vaguely recall the union. That was the last time Eric saw dad alive.My parents divorced when I was six years old. Dad drifted in and out of my lifefor a few years. Then when I was eight, dad came back into my life and myparents started to talk of salving their marriage. By then it was too late, dadgrew ill with lung cancer. I can recall the times he was well enough to speakto me. He told me, "Peanut, I'm going to beat this. Your mom and I are going toremarry. I made a lot of mistakes in my life but this time it's going to bedifferent. We're going to be a family. We'll move to Florida and live on ahouseboat close to your brother." Despite his best efforts, dad lost the fightin July of 1985, only a month after his sixtieth birthday.  His dying wish for me was simply enough. FindEric, tell him he died, he always loved him and to give him some of dad'spossessions. For twenty – six years I've searched for Eric and just when I hadgiven up Eric entered into my life.
                It'sfunny how just when you least expect it the impossible happens. I had given upon finding my brother for a couple of years. A piece of me was always missing.I felt a longing to find out more about my father's side of my family but Ifelt the pain too many times. Each time my hopes were raised they'd crash down.It was a vicious cycle that had to end or I'd go mad. My father's older brotherdied in 1997 after the funeral I called one of his daughters. It felt good totalk to her. I had hoped she knew where my brother was but the first thing sheasked, "Do you know where Eric is?" I felt my hopes once again shatter. Theyhadn't heard from him in years.  Determined I continued to search for him.  I found Eric's law office, called him but hissecretary never told him I had called.  Once again, my heart broke. I was so close tohim!
                In2001, I married the love of my life. I told him about my dad and missingbrother. He urged me not to give up the fight. Last year, I searched theinternet for any Eric James Bruning I could find. I knew his birthday, thestate he lived in and that he was a lawyer. When I was little, dad had apicture of Eric with his wife. I use to stare at that picture so much so I hadmemorized his face. With a mental imagine and facts stored in my mind, Isearched MySpace, Facebook, and other social network I could think of.  Finally I found an Eric Bruning in Florida andsent him a message. A year went by with no reply.  My heart fell again. Thoughts rolled in myhead. Maybe he doesn't care he has a sister. I saved the picture of him he hadon his MySpace account so I would have an updated photo of him. I thought tomyself, he may not care about me but he's dad's son and I care a lot about him.I held that picture near and dear to my heart and vowed to end my searchforever. Enough was enough.
                Lastyear, I received an email stating Eric Bruning Refound You. I couldn't believemy eyes. Was this a joke? If it was it was a cruel one! I read the email and myheart lifted a bit. I recognized the man in the picture. Eric was talking tome? Can this be real? I close the email and looked through other emails he sentme. I read every single one. He told me details only he would know and left mea phone number. He wanted me to call! I picked the phone and called himimmediately. We've been talking ever since. My brother loves me and I love him.