The Masks Are Off

One unexpected benefit of the pandemic is how easy it is to see who’s a selfish prick. Previously you could really only guess at that. Sure, you could pick up hints from how they were standing, or whether they were in the process of berating serving staff, but you couldn’t be sure. Now, though, at least in my part of the world, where it has become mandatory to wear a mask while out of the house, you can see with just one glance who doesn’t give a crap about their fellow citizens.

For example, today I passed by a woman who had a mask dangling from her chin while holding a coffee. So I could tell that she cared about me a little, but not more than her coffee. Two people who stood on opposite sides of the path while holding dogs on leads cared to avoid breathing all over each other, but not so much about everyone trying to divert around them. The dude who pounded past with no mask, breathing all over everyone, didn’t give a single shit.

I really like how this is so clear. Obviously the selfishness itself isn’t great. We can do without that. But you can’t fix a problem without identifying it, and for that, this mask business is super helpful.

I’m not saying we could fix a lot of societal problems by rounding these people up and firing them into the sun. That would be silly. Accurate. But silly. Because we’re not going to be allowed to do that. Also, you know, once you get into rounding people up, for whatever reason, that has a bad vibe. We don’t want to start with that.

We have to live with these people—even though, clearly, they don’t care much about living with us. But that’s okay; that’s what we’ve always done. Now it’s just clearer who appreciates the social contract and who doesn’t. Which I feel like has been a growing issue: How when you live in a city instead of a village, most of the social penalties for being a selfish prick fall away. A person can successfully avoid the appropriate consequences for being a selfish prick forever, because their bad reputation doesn’t stick with them. But not so much now, when they wear it on their face.

P.S. Seriously, where does this come from? The thing that perplexes me is how kind and generous kids are. Kids are so naturally selfless and empathetic, you have to stop them giving away their stuff. Are we beating this out of them? Or does something happen in the teenage years? Crazy.

P.P.S. Also obviously there are exceptions. For example, some people believe they are fighting a global conspiracy bent on human enslavement. Are these people selfish pricks? Yes, yes, they are. Because it doesn’t take that much to educate yourself. It’s the Information Age. But they are also super misguided, which is probably more relevant to their motivation than the selfishness.

P.P.P.S. About the runner—I ran 15 kilometers on Sunday in a mask. It was fine. I also gave pedestrians a wide berth because I value their health more than my slight inconvenience.