Home again!

So it was a lovely vacation. It wasn't as busy as we usually are--and while the kids were sort of sad about that, I was thrilled. We drove to a couple of state parks-- Makerricher (sp), Russian Gulch, Glass Beach--and took the dogs on long walks, and even played in the sand for a little.


That was okay--it was bigger and more fun than a hotel room (and cuter too) and we got to keep the dogs. We also didn't eat out much because it had a tiny kitchen too! Wheee!

Coming home was a comedy of errors though.

So was ZoomBoy.
So... about being car sick. And needing a bathroom on the road from Mendocino to what was GOING TO BE San Francisco.
A. There are very few bathrooms.
B. If you find a bathroom, you might need your own toilet paper.
C. If you find out you need your own toilet paper at the wrong time, remember, CELL PHONES DON'T WORK so you may have to holler to a random stranger in the next portajohn to please get your husband in the Honda Odyssey and have him bring the toilet paper.

E. If you happened to buy extra toilet paper because the tiny house you rented didn't have enough rolls, you may perhaps feel as if serendipity is on your side.
F. Your son may also still be trying to write a comedy routine about "does a boy shit in the woods?"
And now you know.
Anyway-- we were winding around the road and it was hot and we weren't seeing signs of civilization and Mate made an abrupt tactical decision and decided to take Mountain View Road to Williams, instead of driving all the way down to San Francisco.

OH DEAR GOD.
It was like we were eternally stuck on Bob's Bogus Road-- between the aborted trip to the Cabin in the Woods to Mountain View "let's just drop the car off a side of a cliff because the road's not really there" Road, I have never--repeat NEVER--been so glad to see Hwy 5 in my life. So WHAT if it's straight as a ruler. So WHAT if there's a thousand semis on it. You know what? I'm not gonna upchuck on that road, and there is ALWAYS A FUCKING ROAD when you expect a FUCKING ROAD.
*pants a little*
So, uhm, that was fun.

We got home.
We slept pretty much all of Saturday. Someone asked me for a chat, and honestly, I couldn't even brain words. Mate and I stared into space--we didn't even do laundry. Apparently Bob's Bogus Roads suck your soul out your eyeballs through a straw--and now you know.


Published on July 20, 2020 01:08
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