Can I, Please? (poem)

Can I unlove you just for tonight,⠀

so that I could drink the sky’s ⠀

midnight-blue as wine ⠀

and have the stars for dessert? ⠀

Can I unlove you just for this moment,⠀

so that I could swallow the moon ⠀

and plant it between my ribs? ⠀

Can I unlove you just for today, ⠀

so that I could catch the sun ⠀

and rub it all over my body ⠀

for the much-needed warmth? ⠀

For when I love you, I forget what the ⠀

celestial beings can do to me. ⠀

Instead, I dwell in this muck called ⠀

unrequited love, unsolicited suffering.⠀

So, darling, never be the addiction ⠀

that I turn to, ⠀

when I am at my vulnerable best. ⠀

I am here, trying to unlove you ⠀

with every passing moment, ⠀

but you crack inside jokes ⠀

and there grows my longing for you. ⠀

I am here, trying to shred every ounce of my unreturned feelings, ⠀

but you shake hands and there ⠀

I sow the poor love-seed again. ⠀

⠀

Yet, I would try to unlove you, ⠀

by doing little things. ⠀

Like stamping the begonias ⠀

that you smelt a moment before. ⠀

Like ignoring the platonic kindness ⠀

that you throw at me. ⠀

Like sharing so bland conversations ⠀

that you begin to wonder ⠀

whether I am a woman ⠀

with feelings and emotions. ⠀

⠀

And then I realize, you are like ⠀

that one song that I never ⠀

tire of listening. ⠀

I cannot exist without loving you. ⠀

Even trying to unlove you is impossible. ⠀

~Kavya Janani. U

This poem was recently featured in Globalage Caption (@globalagecaption), sister page of the popular Globalage Poetry.