Like A Fool

Never refuse any advance of friendship, for if nine out of ten bring you nothing, one alone may repay you.
-Madame de Tencin

January 22, 2012

In case you were wondering…

Last year (2011), I found my old friend Mark Landreth via Face Book. He immediately became my friend and asked if I still go to the gym. I sent him a brief bio of my current life and he obviously checked-out a few of my photos and relationship status. I was surprised when he abruptly "un-friended" me for no apparent reason without any further communication. I can only assume that he had a negative, prejudicial issue about my long-term relationship with a man. Or could it be that he had his own qualms with attraction towards me from 'way back when'.   I always felt he 'felt something' but was likely fighting it (or maybe that was my hope at the time).  He offered no explanation and I have not heard from him since.  It's clear he is still staying fit from the sole photo showing as his Face Book profile photo of him mountain climbing.


In case you were wondering…


Eileen Grabinsky is still a dear friend. She visited me in New York City several years ago with an old boyfriend/flame who was visiting from Italy. She still lives in the South San Francisco area and we exchange occasional phone calls and Christmas cards every year. She seems to be loving life as a hair stylist. She has never married.

Twenty-five years ago today

January 22, 1987
Thursday

Rhoda Takeda was nice enough to give a presentation yesterday about compensation. She made a point of expressly saying that our actual payday is tomorrow (Friday), not today. However, we usually receive our paychecks by 2PM or 3PM on Thursdays. I need the funds as soon as I can get them. I am also lacking a two-hundred dollar payment that is due to me. I have yet to receive it. It's apparently in 'limbo'. It should have posted on my last paycheck. Shit! I shall inquire about it today.

I really miss family sometimes with mom, dad, Ashley, John, Sherri, Lauren and Helen. For some reason, Tony has been getting on my nerves when I am around him for too long.

While on the phone with Eileen Grabinsky today I said, "I miss you."
I'm looking forward to our nice dinner together on January 31st when I pick her up at San Francisco Airport. She seems to be having a nice visit in Portland, OR.

Lynne (Rhoda's friend) is now my new travel package adviser. He is going to make sure the details on my Hawaii trip are worked out nicely.
Lynne stated professionally, "I will give you all of the necessary information today."
The idea of being 'alone with the sun rays' is time that I need. I can't wait. I haven't really had that in a long time. Palm Springs didn't count due to the fact that Greg Manachevitz and Mike Miller appeared unexpectedly. I didn't get enough 'lie out in the sun' time. I won't even recall the sighting of Paul Margolis. That was a fiasco.

My trip to New York City with Ron Leoni was an altogether different sort of trip. Paris with Paloma was a cultural enjoyment. I did travel alone to Paris, so that did make for a nice, therapeutic break.

This forthcoming Hawaiian escape will prove to be a relaxing adventure. I know it.

Lynne, my travel arranger, called in sick today! What a drag. Oh well, I will be patient.

Paloma's letter that I mailed to her on November 18, 1986 returned to me from Spain. It beats me as to where she is now. I am puzzled.

I ate lunch with Carla and some really dorky African-American who was helping set up a cabin escape (for Carla) this weekend. Carla was excited about the escape with some of her friends. I was a little pissed-off because I had to pay for Carla's lunch.
"Oh Michael, I don't have my wallet with me."
I thought, "There's a limit and the limit is NOW."

After work I went home and slept for a while. My brain needed rest. It's a drag getting out of work at 5PM, especially when my office phone rings at 4:55PM.

I did make it to the gym. Mark Landreth was not there. I did see Anne Alberti, leaving the club with that bald Jeff character as I was parking my car. She pretended NOT to notice me. I could easily detect a tiny smirk of a smile. I honked my horn but I didn't even choose to look to see if she 'looked'. I simply parked my car and entered the gym. Anne is definitely NO LOSS to me. Her weaknesses more than outweigh her strengths.

I tried to call Eileen but she wasn't available. She was probably exploring with her sister, Erin (who is twenty-six years old).
PHOTO: Eileen Grabinsky,
wearing my leather jacket from Paris on February 1, 1987

I telephoned Bob Guild and his cheek is swollen.
I laughed out loud and asked, "It's still swollen?"
Bob snapped, "It isn't funny!"
He's really mean. I don't like it. He acted upset because I didn't call him yesterday. I don't owe him 'shit'. I invited him over (like a fool). After I invited him he seemed to detect some foolish reasoning behind my invite.
Finally, I blurted, "Look, I don't play head games with people!"
Bob apologized.
Bob said, "You know, Mike, I had a bad day combined with my swollen cheek. I actually told a couple of people off today that didn't deserve it."
I guess I was the third person he told off that didn't deserve it.
I calmed down and said calmly, "We all tend to have our moody days."
Of course I thought to myself that certain people tend to deal with moody days better than others.

I tried to telephone Mark. He wasn't home. I felt a need for his calm voice. I was planning on telling him the truth about the 20/20 show he saw last week about sperm donor fathers and how I am one of them. I had previously told Mark that I had a friend that donated his sperm for the needy cause. I need to explain further that 'in reality' the friend is 'me'. As far as I know, there is a one-year old little girl out there in this world that is a part of me.

I hate it when I dress up in business attire and people think I have career goal plans up my sleeve. I don't know what the uproar is all about. I just feel like dressing nice. What is wrong with this?

Look for the good things, not the faults. It takes a good deal bigger-sized brain to find out what is NOT wrong with people and things, than to find out what is wrong.
-R. L. Sharpe