That's not real publishing (Part 3)

"Today I was signed to a literary agency – tomorrow I shall conquer the publishing world. Mwa-ha-ha-ha."

Such is the battle cry of those authors whoactually get an agent to read and then accept a submission. I've heard itseveral times from fellow writers in my local writers' circle. The really interestingthing, though, is this: representation does not equal publication .
All unpublished authors should repeat this mantra 100 times whilst sitting in a full lotus position before eating their breakfastmuesli.
I shall relate the tale of a man I know: he'sa university professor and a writer of children's literature.  Funny, charming and, I think, talented. Moretalented than me? Obviously – he's a professor, dammit. But a better writerthan me? Who can say? I certainly can't.
When the Prof approached agencies, they hada feeding frenzy. At one point, I believe, he had four or five agentsclamouring to represent him. He had his choice of agents, and understandablychose one who is reputedly top of her field. That was probably about threeyears ago. A while back he ditched her. He wasn't published, despite thenumerous revisions she had suggested [onewonders what made his material so special if she had to suggest revisions: whatdid sh want – a writing credit?]. Off he went, into the arms of another topagent.
The Prof is still has no publishing deal.
The same agent into whose arms the Prof ranrepresents another author I know, a historical novelist, and has done forseveral years: but does she have that contract? No. [EDIT - Actually, YES: with brilliantly good timing, Jenny Barden, the lady in question, announced today - 13 December 2011 - that she has signed to Ebury - part of Random House. Good luck, Jenny, you are a brilliant writer and you deserve every success).
There are obviously advantages to having anagent – for one thing they are the only route to being read by most largepublishing houses – but they are not gods. In the UK they seem to exist purely to suppressthe majority writers, to stop them from reaching those publishers.
Coinciding with my failed attempts toobtain representation and to slip into agency limbo like my two colleagues, I observeda mini-revolution taking place. E-books were becoming a reality.
I never for a minute thought I would selfpublish, and certainly gave e-books no consideration at all, other thanwondering how anyone could enjoy reading a full length novel on a mini-computer.After all, back-lit text is not easy on the eye, and I like to read beforesleep. Why would I want an e-reader? Why would I inflict one on anyone else?
Earlier this year, in a fit of pique, Idecided to serialise Pike's Quest on the web. For free. It was a bad decision.
I was inspired by Jonathan Pinnock'ssuccess with Mrs Darcy versus the Aliens, but I was mistaken as to the suitabilityof Pike for dissection into short, digestible chunks.  Mr Pinnock had written Mrs Darcy specificallyfor serialisation in short chucks of around 600 – 800 words. Each piece wasself contained and the humour was immediate (annoyingly, it also works a a novel, especially good for city commuters). Pike, on the other hand, is a60,000 word novel in twenty-four chapters, some of which are 4000 words long,with jokes that stretch across the entire novel. An extreme example of this isa tool bag that is lost in chapter four or five. It is briefly mentioned later,but the pay-off will not appear until Book 2 is written. It's the old comedy banana-skintechnique: drop the skin in the opening scene and the clod will slip on it nearthe end - and rather like the opening quote at the head of Part 1.
In short, chopping-up Pike intotwice-weekly sections was not good. The flow was lost. As one reviewer onAmazon states, "... it was a thought provoking page turner with a healthy dose of laugh out loud humour." Chopping it up detracted from both of thesequalities.
It was while considering my options that Irealised that I was already embracing e-publishing, but in a non-user friendlyway. Now I had to find out how it all worked. 
Part 4 follows soon ...
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