I’ve lost track of what day it is. Or what time.

Tangina, tanghali na.

Some days I am insatiable. I crave sex and sensation to remind myself that I’m alive. Other days I lose myself in the abstract world, the pages of Mary Shelley’s Frankenstein or the chaos of the internet. I forget I am flesh and blood until my head throbs and my stomach rumbles.

I suspect you feel the same way, caught in a pendulum of not-life and not-death. Without a routine, the distraction of jobs, and constant societal demands, we are forced to contend with the real questions. What is life about? What is my purpose? Is it the apocalypse out there or an elaborate lie? If you think we’re living in a dystopia now, it’s important to note that some people in other parts of the world have been living a version of hell for a long time. What is my part in all of this?

Drink your water, bitch.

Take a shower or a bath.

Get some fresh air.

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This is my first hike of the year, less than an hour each way. The sheer rocks on Megunticook trail up Mt. Battie was steep, but the Penobscot wind at the summit was sweet.