He found me when I was loosing myself (Part 5)
I continued attending the Sunday service. Aside from the usual Sunday worship service, there were other Church activities during weekdays. Other activities were announced during the Sunday service, we were encouraged to attend our respective group designation. There were group for women, youth, and also prayer meeting during Fridays. I once attended a prayer meeting. I didn't have the slightest idea of what would happen, but one thing I was sure of, we were going to pray, and that was because it was called prayer meeting. Wasn't it obvious?
I attended the prayer meeting. I was nervous. I arrived on time thinking that I didn't want to have any conversation with other people. I just wanted to reserve my seat and listen or pray or whatever I must do during the meeting. I didn't intend to meet and greet others, it was never easy for me to do that. It always felt like all hell break loose in my mind when I met strangers.
The prayer meeting started late. While I was waiting, there were only three of us and a woman whom I knew during my childhood days and tried her best to engage me in a conversation. Mostly, she was the one who did the talking. She tried to show me thru her stories how blessed she was, how wonderful her family was. I listened to her patiently while I tried to put on the appropriate expression on my face on everything that she said.
I arrived 7:30 in the evening, but the prayer meeting started 8 or 8:30 the most. There was a lecture about a story from the New Testament. I remember something about Bethpage from the discussion of the Bishop, I am not even sure. At the end of the lecture, we prayed by partner and some solo. I was with a partner and I was nervous, as always. She was kind enough to pray for me, and I didn't pray for her. Why? Because I didn't know how to or more like I was afraid that others would hear my prayer and discover how ugly the way I pray. After she prayed for me, I told her I would go home though I knew that the prayer meeting had not yet reached its conclusion. Others were still praying, but I was determined to leave. I felt insecure. That was the first and last time I attended the prayer meeting.
~end of part 5~
I attended the prayer meeting. I was nervous. I arrived on time thinking that I didn't want to have any conversation with other people. I just wanted to reserve my seat and listen or pray or whatever I must do during the meeting. I didn't intend to meet and greet others, it was never easy for me to do that. It always felt like all hell break loose in my mind when I met strangers.
The prayer meeting started late. While I was waiting, there were only three of us and a woman whom I knew during my childhood days and tried her best to engage me in a conversation. Mostly, she was the one who did the talking. She tried to show me thru her stories how blessed she was, how wonderful her family was. I listened to her patiently while I tried to put on the appropriate expression on my face on everything that she said.
I arrived 7:30 in the evening, but the prayer meeting started 8 or 8:30 the most. There was a lecture about a story from the New Testament. I remember something about Bethpage from the discussion of the Bishop, I am not even sure. At the end of the lecture, we prayed by partner and some solo. I was with a partner and I was nervous, as always. She was kind enough to pray for me, and I didn't pray for her. Why? Because I didn't know how to or more like I was afraid that others would hear my prayer and discover how ugly the way I pray. After she prayed for me, I told her I would go home though I knew that the prayer meeting had not yet reached its conclusion. Others were still praying, but I was determined to leave. I felt insecure. That was the first and last time I attended the prayer meeting.
~end of part 5~
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