Not Good Enough

How many times have you heard this? Thought this? As a writer, I hear it all the time. Sometimes it’s subtle: “change this, delete that.” Sometimes it’s more aggressive: “I don’t believe in this enough to get behind it,” or “this just doesn’t work for me,” or “your work isn’t a priority.”

As a creative, my instinct is to take this rejection personally. When they say some version of “NOT GOOD ENOUGH,” what I really hear is “I’M NOT GOOD ENOUGH.” Doesn’t matter how many times I tell myself it’s not personal, that’s always how it feels.

But then I flip and let it motivate me. “Oh you didn’t like that book, wait till you read the next one. You didn’t connect with that blog post? Wait till you read the next one.” While this way of thinking has kept me determined, it’s also been dangerous. It’s an acknowledgement that what others think is important to how I view my own work. And if I’m honest with myself (and if you’re a creative, you should be honest with yourself, too), what other people think is important. I’m not writing for myself, I’m writing for an audience. I’m writing to be heard, to make people feel emotionally connected in some way. If I don’t accomplish that, it affects me.

That said, I’ve learned to set my own standards. Before I share anything, I want to love it. And even if others don’t, I’ll still love it. Yes, I’ll be disappointed, but I won’t let that disappointment change how I feel about what I’ve created. There are too many other factors involved in getting attention to the things I create. I won’t let those factors disrupt my creativity.

How do you deal with the feeling of not being good enough?

CRY

MORE FROM CRY

Have you read my novella Thoughts of a Fractured Soul? If you haven’t, here’s a short description:

Corey is reflecting on his life as a teenager who has just had his first child. He relives his story through a series of fragmented memories, pieces of sporadic thought capturing moments of his life as he tries to care for his family. But Corey is failing, and as he continues to struggle he realizes how easily the world can fracture his ambitions and force him to settle for a life of mediocrity. Thoughts of a Fractured Soul pushes the reader to piece together these fragments themselves, and decide on what part of Corey’s conflicting tale can be trusted.

Get a copy today.

Not Good Enough was originally published in C.R.Y on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.