Would you like to share a hug?

A hug for bear (unpublished) © by Tim Warnes

 

“Hugs can do great amounts of good - especially for children.”

— Princess Diana

I don’t know about you, but right now, I’m in serious need of some hugs.

I’m a very tactile person - so physical affection is important to me. During this coronavirus pandemic, I’m really missing the physical affection of friends and family.

I am blessed with lots of friends who express their affection and love with hugs. (I like strong, affirming, manly hugs best.) But now, I am deprived of them. Instead, I receive weird hug emojis (that, frankly, look kind of sinister).

So I made this little video to cheer myself up!

 'Hug 'O War' by Shel Silverstein.
Read by Maurice C. Hamster.
Taken from 'Where the Sidewalk Ends' by Shel Silverstein (Harper Row 1974). 

The word ‘hug’ has its origins in the Old Norse word, hygga, which means ‘to comfort’ (which is also the likely source of the hip Danish word, hygge - ‘to give courage, comfort, joy’). We could all do with some of that right now.

During life B.C. (before COVID-19), if a friend told their kid to ‘give Tim a hug,’ I would gently express my view that to hug is a choice. Being forced to embrace (or receive hugs from) your aunt/uncle/grandparent can be traumatic for some. Just ask Maurice Sendak, who describes visiting uncles and aunts as having ‘bloodshot eyes and big huge noses and bad teeth.’

 

[T]hey would grab you by the cheek and pummel you and say all the conventional things like, ‘I’ll eat you up,’ and knowing them, they probably would and could.

- Sendak's Legacy: Helping Kids 'Survive Childhood'

  

In an NPR radio interview, Sendak goes into more detail:

 

[M]y entertainment was to examine them closely, you know, the huge nose, and the hair curling out of the nose and the weird mole on the side of the head, and so you would glue in on that, and then you’d talk about it with your brother or sister later, and they became the wild things.

- ‘ FRESH AIR’ REMEMBERS AUTHOR MAURICE SENDAK WITH TERRY GROSS

 

But for most of us, consensual hugging feels good - which is unsurprising, since they are ‘ an extended form of a fundamental human need: touch .’

Meaning hugs have positive effects on our health and well-being!

Hugs strengthen social bonds.

Hugs give you a better night’s sleep.

Hugs make me feel good! 

They calm the nervous system, reduce stress and help relieve anxiety.

(Scientifically speaking, ‘feel-good’ hormones (Oxytocin, Seratonin and Dopamine) are released, and the ‘stress hormone’ (Cortisol) is suppressed.)

(And, rather ironically (now that we are social-distancing), turns out hugging increasing the number of natural killer cells, ‘the frontline of the immune system’.)

*sigh*

I wish I had a cat.

Though hugs may be strictly off-limits with anyone outside our household, we can share them virtually - and books that have loving hugging at their hearts can help. 

 

HUG by Jez Alborough (Walker Books 2000) | Illustration © 2000 by Jez Alborough

 HUG by Jez Alborough (Walker Books 2000) oozes warmth.

The story of Bobo, an endearing baby chimp, wandering the jungle alone in search of a hug, was a firm favourite when my kids were young. I still have their childhood copy of the story - a chunky, oversized (now well-chewed) board book edition.

There is a multitude of ‘lost’ themed picture books out there, some brilliant, some trite. HUG! stands out as a classic example of a well-crafted picture book. Alborough manages to tell the story - and engage us emotionally - using just his illustration and a single, repeated refrain, (presented in speech bubbles): Hug. That’s quite a skill!

 

HUG by Jez Alborough (Walker Books 2000) | Illustration © 2000 by Jez Alborough

 

HUG is smart and deceptively simple - made all the more appealing by Alborough’s absorbing jungle illustrations, of which The Guardian said, ‘[t]he big, bright pictures dance off the page with such exuberance that you can’t help but feel happy while you are looking at it.’

The elephants carry Bobo, helping him to find his mama. On the way they encounter happy animal families enjoying their hugs, to which Bobo responds - Hug.

You can see the little waif’s hope for a hug fading fast, as he becomes more and more crestfallen.

 

HUG by Jez Alborough (Walker Books 2000) | Illustration © 2000 by Jez Alborough

 

Just before your heart breaks for Bobo, he’s reunited in a comforting embrace with his Mama. So satisfying!

Seeing this takes me back to storytime with my boys. I wish I could hug one right now...

 

HUG by Jez Alborough (Walker Books 2000) | Illustration © 2000 by Jez Alborough

 My next Good to Read is one of my own:I’m Going to Give You a Bear Hug! written by Caroilne B. Cooney (Zonderkids 2016). 

From I’m Going to Give You a Bear Hug! by Caroline B. Cooney, ill. by Tim Warnes (Zonderkidz 2016) | Illustration © 2016 by Tim Warnes

 

I’m always on the hunt for sweet, calming books that are perfect for bedtime. I’m Going to Give You a Bear Hug! is one of those books!

…

My triplet boys found this book especially sweet because all three of them hug me differently, and it’s something that we were able to talk and giggle about during our goodnight storytime.

- It Happens in a Blink

 

Despite its apparent simplicity, this project was really tricky!

Like Alborough in HUG!, I had to work out a way to apply a narrative thread to Cooney’s prose through my illustrations and bring an extra dimension to the story. Eventually, I hit upon the idea that the hugs were played out in the boy’s imagination over the course of getting ready for bed.

It was worth the effort - Bear Hug! has been well received, and has done well enough well for there to be a companion title, I’m Going to Give You a Polar Bear Hug! (scheduled for release later this year).

Melissa, on her A Sparkle of Genius blog wrote:

 

I’m Going to Give You a Bear Hug! is an adorable, creative, colorful book that makes the perfect bedtime story. It combines all of my favorite things and teaches our children all about the power of a hug. I love the imagination that this story portrays from the eyes of a child. 

- A Sparkle of Genius

 

From I’m Going to Give You a Bear Hug! by Caroline B. Cooney, ill. by Tim Warnes (Zonderkidz 2016) | Illustration © 2016 by Tim Warnes

 

Finally, this - from a lovely email that I received last year from an appreciative mother, who wrote:

 

 I purchased I’m Going to Give You a Bear Hug! … when [my son] was around two years old ... [I]t has been a favorite, even today at four. He told me tonight, while on the caterpillar bug hug page, that these pictures make him happy. 

 

Isn’t that wonderful!

I hope and your little ones, whether near or far, can find a connection this Easter weekend that makes you feel happy. If you’re feeling the strain from being confined to the home with your kids, then at the end of the day, find a good book, and hug it out at storytime.

This separation from our loved ones, be they family or friends, may well be the trickiest thing we have to deal with during the coronavirus pandemic. 

  US CUSTOMERS CAN PURCHASE BEAR HUG DIRECTLY FROM ZONDERKIDZ USING THE LINK BELOWUK Customers - please support your local bookshop 


BUY BEAR HUG!

Available in soft padded Board Book and Hardback versions.

Alternatively, try your local bookshop or search online.

* RATED 5 STAR BY 93% OF AMAZON REVIEWERS **RATED AVERAGE 4.2 STAR ON GOOD READS* Good to Read 

Books FOR HUGGING to!

Guess How Much I Love You by Sam McBratney, ill. by Anita Jeram (Walker Books 1994)

I Love You to the Moon and Back by Tim Warnes (Little Tiger Press 2015)

Daddy Hug by Tim Warnes, ill. by Jane Chapman (HarperCollins)

Mommy Hug by Tim Warnes, ill. by Jane Chapman (HarperCollins)

I’m Going to Give You a Bear Hug! by Rosemary B. Cooney, ill. by Tim Warnes (Zonderkidz 2016)

 SourcesA-Z QuotesHug O’ War by Shel Silverstein. From Where the Sidewalk Ends (Harper Row 1974) The Science of Hugs: The Most Undervalued Gift You Can Give by Kulraj (kulraj.org, September 9, 2014)Wikipedia: Hygge Sendak's Legacy: Helping Kids 'Survive Childhood' by Lauren Silverman (NPR, May 8, 2012) ‘ FRESH AIR’ REMEMBERS AUTHOR MAURICE SENDAK WITH TERRY GROSS Hugging – 7 Backed-by-Science Benefits (Parenting For Brain)HUG by Jez Alborough (Walker Books 2000)I’M GOING TO GIVE YOU A BEAR HUG! BY CAROLINE B. COONEY, ILL. BY TIM WARNES (ZONDERKIDZ 2016) I’M GOING TO GIVE YOU A BEAR HUG CHILDREN’S BOOK REVIEW (It Happens in a blink, February 3, 2017) 6 SCIENCE-BACKED REASONS WHY YOU SHOULD GO HUG SOMEONE NOW (Brainfodder.org) The Shocking Truth Behind Hugs by Susanna Newsonen (The Happyologist)