Somebody called "Twatwaffle29" is now following me.

I couldn't follow back fast enough. In fact, so eager was I to follow back, I sprained my follow back finger and it is now in a little sling. I prescribed myself 2 aspirins and a cup of tea and expect to make a full recovery.

Twatwaffle is such a fun word.

I love expanding my vocabulary because it makes me sound smart at parties—that is, if I ever get invited to any. I can't wait till the day when I will be able to say brilliant things like "Won't you excuse me? I have to meander to the feces receptacle and make a deposit" and all the babes'll swoon.

Whenever I learn a new vocabulary word, I use it in sentences. That way it eats its way into my memory like a termite made out of syllables:

"Man, that dude is a real twatwaffle."
"Oh, mom, not twatwaffles again!"
"Can I put my dickcicle in your twatwaffle?"

Welcome, Twatwaffle29. You can call me Mike.