On Current Events, and You

I’m seeing a lot of people resolve to use this time of quarantine to accomplish old goals or learn new skills, and that’s great. I’m also seeing people say everyone SHOULD be doing that, or worse, beating themselves up because they’re not getting any of those lofty ambitions met. That’s…not great. If you’re struggling right now and feel like you shouldn’t be, or feel like you’re failing, take some advice from an old hand at this.

My credentials: I’ve been a full-time writer for almost five years. I live alone and work from home, so what a lot of people are just now experiencing with quarantine is my normal life. I’m also, my readers know, an obsessive workaholic who writes three books a year and maybe takes one day off a month. Maybe. To be a writer, you have to be a self-starter; if you can’t motivate yourself you’ll never get anything done. Point being: productivity is my job. Discipline is my job. This is what I DO.

So you might be thinking, well, Craig’s fine. His situation hasn’t changed much and he’s used to driving his own business. Maybe he’s even more productive than usual!

Nope.

I’ll tell you the truth: I had a day last week where it took me nine hours to write five hundred words. Nine hours, to do what I can normally do in one. The uncertainty and fear of this month — worrying about my loved ones, worrying about how I’m going to get groceries, or what happens if people stop buying books, or the fucking toilet paper shortage of all things — it all just piled on and piled on, background radiation seeping in through my studio walls.

We are not living in this moment, we are surviving this moment, and survival is hard work. It’s hard work even when it feels just like sitting still. Being driven is something I have spent years training my body and mind for, and this is even hard for me. So if you’re in lockdown and new to the feeling, with nothing but time on your hands, and the best you can manage at the end of the day is watching Netflix? That’s fine. You’re fine. You’re surviving.

And if someone is telling you that you’re lazy or unmotivated because you’re not learning French or taking up the trombone or writing the great American novel, they’re dead wrong. And an asshole. And probably trying to sell you something. The fact is, you only have so much energy, and the world is a thief right now, sucking it dry.

If all you accomplish today is surviving, well…that’s a pretty damn great accomplishment. And I’m cheering you on.