What It’s Like To Get On An International Flight, Right Now

Not gonna lie: I definitely spent a decent percentage of the week before my parents and I left on our annual diving trip obsessively scanning coronavirus-related headlines and buying massive amounts of water. (Buying extra water – as with toilet paper – is completely unnecessary. But show me a mother and a Contagious Thing, and I’ll show you a garage stocked with a whoooooooole lot of Dasani.)

I wasn’t worried about catching anything, exactly – I was (and still am) worried about some turn of...