We Live in a Vulnerable Time: How to Cope
When Oprah Winfrey talked recently with Michelle Obama, they covered many topics. They concluded that whether we are lonely because of losing family, or vulnerable because of losing strong connections, or feeling low or near to depression, we must remember that it’s easy to go low, to make people feel afraid and much more challenging to go high and survive.
We often gravitate toward vulnerability, and yet it requires more energy and thoughtful thinking to pull folks together and to believe in the positives.
Obama: “It’s easy to make people feel afraid. But we should not seek revenge…but think long term. Public figures have a responsibly as to what we say to young people. I tell them: walk your own walk. Values define us…You can’t quit when it’s hard.”
Which made me think of Franklin Delano Roosevelt and his radio “fireside chats.” It was the Great Depression, and the 32nd president needed to send a positive message to his people. Using his voice, he quelled rumors, explained his policies. His reassuring tone helped allay fears, dispel despair and uncertainty, give his citizens the faith they needed to keep going. Such actions made FDR one of our most successful presidents.
As Michelle Obama often points out, it’s relatively easy to make people feel afraid. It’s a challenge for a leader of the country, for the head of a family, for the owner of a business to honor the emotions of people who rely on them, but also to inspire them to look ahead, believe that things will right themselves. When you can do that, you are truly being a leader, a good parent, an amazing boss.
Michelle Obama stresses that we are responsible for our own happiness, because it comes from within. She emphatically states that: It’s your journey, you define your own happiness and you walk your own walk. Now that she is fifty-six, she realizes even more that we are not machines, health problems will occur and we can no longer look like we’re twenty!
“You all just have the same lips,” she cracks, referring to enhancements that many crave. And then she says: “Don’t make that your goal. I remember feeling self-doubt when someone criticized the size of my butt. I was angry. I’m a black woman in America. But we all have baggage and self-doubts. So I tell myself: CHANGE THAT RECORDING IN YOUR HEAD.”
MICHELLE OBAMA’S PERFECT DAY…
Now that she is no longer First Lady, Michelle lives a quieter life which she relishes–she and Barack and their dogs Bo and Sunny the only ones at the dinner table (she jokes). Then she describes her PERFECT DAY: “I don’t cook. I tune out the world. I read or watch good television.”
And if she is out in the world–a good day would be the opportunity to make “other people feel seen.” Her best goal is to: “Shine a light on some young woman.”
During her conversation with Oprah, Michelle spoke of having Stephen Colbert as a dinner-mate at the White House. They agreed that empathy is about making others feel seen, hearing their stories, standing in their shoes.
Michelle achieved a great deal during her time in the White House, working to help the families of veterans and all military families. Her work with nutrition, the White House garden and making sure that schools provided nutritious meals for growing bodies were all part of her outreach in helping others.
AN HONOR TO SERVE
Though she might talk light-heartedly about her time in the White House, she will also say flat out that it was an honor for her to server in her role of First Lady. In her words, she explained: “My life must mean something to someone else.”
Michelle Obama has many amazing qualities–but she truly GETS IT, stating that she wants to be an empathetic person. Michelle worries about those who don’t have what they need for a full life. And because our young people, the next generation, will be our leaders, she wants to give them everything they will need, wants to empower them with honesty, empathy and compassion. She also mentioned awareness so that they can walk their own pathway, but with truth.
HOW TO MOVE FORWARD?
It’s a tough question. We have a lot on our plates right now. Some of us more than others. But if we can remember to use understanding, to seek the truth and to offer love and care when we can, we will be making our society better in this vulnerable time.
Also remember: smile, but don’t shake hands; talk kindly and when you’re out in the public square where you might have to open a door, hold on to a railing-Don’t touch your face! Stay safe, stay healthy.
Photo: Politico
