You know what trope I'm sick of?
I was thinking about this the other day. I read several YA books last year that featured this trope, and it always makes me feel gross. It's the trope of a person getting together with, or at least carrying a torch for, their childhood best friend/crush. This happened in Robin Brande's Fat Cat, Gayle Forman's Where She Went, Allie Condie's Matched (sort of), Sara Zarr's Sweethearts (sort of), A.S. King's Please Ignore Vera Dietz. It also happened (sort of) in Mockingjay, though that one didn't bug me because it's more a case of sad, shattered people looking for comfort, rather than teens getting caught up in silly adolescent wish-fulfillment. With the exception of Matched, which was awful, I really enjoyed these books despite not caring for this trope.
Where She Went was a little different because the protagonists were in their early twenties and got back together with their high school partner. I think the ending with them getting back together
rather than moving on made the book just good rather than superb. Just think how touching it would be if the characters, who met by chance and spent the evening together in New York City after not speaking for years, had made up, gotten closure, and moved on to pursue adult lives? Instead, they chose to go back to what they had as teenagers. That seems like a gross idea to me. I would much rather move forward than back.
Maybe it's because I don't look back my childhood too fondly, or the fact that I'm willing to admit that I didn't always make the greatest choices as a teen. Maybe it's the fact that I grew up in a small, conservative town where there weren't any quality boys to date, and I had to wait until I was old enough to drive to meet people that I had more in common with than proximity. At any rate, I wouldn't be able to look at a man I played with on the playground when we were 10 and see him in a romantic or sexual way, even if he turned out to be a cool person.
It pains me to think what my life would be like if I never found anyone I connected with more than a person I met when I was a kid. Sometimes I poke around on Facebook and notice people I went to grade school and high school with getting married to other people from our grade/high school - even if they weren't dating each other back then. Their bridesmaids and groomsmen are also all people from school. They seem happy enough. Good for them! Maybe people like that are who these fantasies are for. But there's nothing about my adolescence that makes me think, "Yeah, I want to hold onto that!"
Where She Went was a little different because the protagonists were in their early twenties and got back together with their high school partner. I think the ending with them getting back together
rather than moving on made the book just good rather than superb. Just think how touching it would be if the characters, who met by chance and spent the evening together in New York City after not speaking for years, had made up, gotten closure, and moved on to pursue adult lives? Instead, they chose to go back to what they had as teenagers. That seems like a gross idea to me. I would much rather move forward than back.
Maybe it's because I don't look back my childhood too fondly, or the fact that I'm willing to admit that I didn't always make the greatest choices as a teen. Maybe it's the fact that I grew up in a small, conservative town where there weren't any quality boys to date, and I had to wait until I was old enough to drive to meet people that I had more in common with than proximity. At any rate, I wouldn't be able to look at a man I played with on the playground when we were 10 and see him in a romantic or sexual way, even if he turned out to be a cool person.
It pains me to think what my life would be like if I never found anyone I connected with more than a person I met when I was a kid. Sometimes I poke around on Facebook and notice people I went to grade school and high school with getting married to other people from our grade/high school - even if they weren't dating each other back then. Their bridesmaids and groomsmen are also all people from school. They seem happy enough. Good for them! Maybe people like that are who these fantasies are for. But there's nothing about my adolescence that makes me think, "Yeah, I want to hold onto that!"
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