Sonic Happy Hour or "The Christian Happy Hour."

Dear Sonic,

I think I've been pretty clear about my love of all things Chick-fil-A. The food is delicious. The service is impeccable. And as every Christian knows, eating there is a like tithing.

I've showered love on the Hamburger Chick-fil-A as well. (You might know it as In-n-Out.)

But you, I've ignored you. Like Johnny Gill in New Edition or Chris Kirkpatrick in NSYNC, you've never really gotten the attention you deserve.

Especially when I look into your ice.

I don't know what shape that ice technically is. Balls? Diamonds? BB's? What the industry term is I know not. I call it, "Frozen heaven."

So round, so perfect, so readily available from someone wearing roller-skates.

It's your ice that made me like you, but it's your happy hour that made me love you. Half price drinks from 2-4? What a gift! What a beverage blessing. What a delightful two-hour window of liquid enjoyment. I drive up and order like a boss. Drink upon drink upon drink. And my bill? $2.98.

Even better, the reason I ultimately broke my long silence about you, Sonic, is the nickname my friends have given that 120 minutes. They call it "The Christian Happy Hour." If I had a nickel for every time someone told me that phrase belonged on SCL, I could buy Powerade slush for the residents of an entire small hamlet.

Why do we call it "The Christian Happy Hour?"

It's complicated.

For a long time, Christians judged you if you had an alcoholic drink. They'd argue that when Jesus turned water into wine that was not really wine. It was like "super grape juice," completely different than say Yellow Tail. Then, things kind of flip flopped. So many Christians started drinking wine and microbrews that people started judging you for not drinking.

My friends would say, "Oh, you don't drink? You must be small-minded and judgmental."

We started judging people for being judgmental. Isn't that rich? Oh me!

It's all very confusing and the more I write about it. The more I realize something.

I need a drink. A beverage of some sorts that will wash away these perplexing times. Small grains of ice that will pulverize these perplexities.

It's time for me to head to the Christian Happy Hour.

Yours in slush,

Jon

Question:

Have you ever heard Sonic called the Christian Happy Hour?