Vote for me

 

Here I am, sitting around on a Sunday morning drinking coffee and listening to Styx, when I get an interesting bit of news.

Two of the anthologies I appeared in last year, Dark Doorways from Post-Mortem Press, and Phobophobia from Dark Continents Publishing, are on the Predators and Editors 2011 Reader's Poll for best anthology. One features Ain't No Grave, my autopsy on the failed marriage of Frank and Alice during the zombie apocalypse, and the other features Ymophobia, the story of a physicist looking for God that accidentally finds Hell instead. As you can imagine, it's a nice feeling.

I don't know which one you should vote for. I think they're both good books, and I'm proud of both stories. But just know that any vote for either of these books will not be in vain. Because, as your nominee, I will do everything in my power to end the scourge of bad horror writing forever. Never again will I allow Courtney Cox to make another Scream movie, and any vampires caught sparkling will be shot on sight. So do your part  in the fight against crappy books, and vote for one of these fine publications. I promise you won't regret it.

Thank you for your support, and God bless America.