Friday Tri: I Would Do Anything to Look Like You
We all have our vanities. I do not care one little peanut about wrinkles on my face or gray hair. I don't care about how my hair looks. I wash it and comb it and that's about it. I sometimes wear nice-ish clothes if I feel like it and they are also comfortable. Don't even get me started on the subject of shoes. But I suppose I do have certain vanities. I am a little vain about my stomach. I wish it were flatter. I am really vain about how many pushups I can do, how long I can stand without assistance on an exercise ball, and my split times at triathlon. My kids are all vain about their own things. 17 is vain about getting into MIT. 16 is vain about her singing voice. 14 is vain about his Christmas ham.
The other day, a woman stopped me at the swimming pool in the middle of a set by pulling on my feet. This is usually the signal that one is being passed. It does not happen to me very often. Actually, I can't remember the last time it happened to me. But there was a guy next to me swimming a little faster, so I thought it might be him and stopped to find this woman who wanted to know why I wore those "things" on my hands and on my feet. I told her they were called paddles and fins (or flippers) and that I bought them on line. They help me keep my body position high and they increase resistance to build up my muscles. Some days I use them more than others. I try not to become dependent on them.
Then the woman asked how many days a week I swim. I told her twice a week, that I swan about a half hour to an hour, which meant 30-70 laps. She was just astonished that I could swim so well and then she asked how old I was. I told her I was 41 and she was just more agog. In a way, this was fun, so I encouraged her to ask a few more questions. She asked if my husband was in super good shape, too. I told her he was in pretty darn good shape and that he is doing an Ironman this May. So she asked if we worked out together a lot, but I admitted that I am usually too impatient to bike with him or even run with him. We can swim together and stay the same pace, but with kids, that doesn't happen often. And so she found out I had 5 kids, too.
At the end of the conversation, she said, "I would do anything to look like you." Which is flattering, really. But also really confusing to me. It took me 8 years since the first time I worked with a trainer to do what I can do. I probably looked pretty good even after that first summer with a trainer. How do you do it? You work out every day. But you also workout smart. That means getting a training plan from someone who knows what they are doing and will help you make sure you don't get injured. If you get injured, you don't just give up. You find something else you can do to keep in shape. You sign up for races and you go out and do them, not because you are going to have any chance of winning, but because you want to challenge yourself. You spend time reading about training. There's a lot of good information on line. You don't give yourself excuses to not do your workout daily. Take Christmas off. Maybe.
It takes time and commitment, yes. But it doesn't take miracles. I am annoyed when people assume that I have always been an athlete. I haven't been. I started doing this eight years ago. I wasn't an athlete in high school. I didn't lift weights ever. If you want to look like me, all you have to do is start where I started and move up from there. It isn't mysterious. It isn't about talent. I am relatively healthy, although I struggle with sinus infections all winter long, migraines, and skin problems in winter. I also had a terrible back and bad knees before I started exercising. Some of these problems have gone away. Some are still there.
When I came home and told my kids about this conversation, they nodded and agreed with me. (And with 4 teenagers in the house, that is a pretty rare thing and I celebrate it). They all remember the summer about 6 years ago when I made them all come with me to the track and run laps three or four times a week. They all hated running the mile. In fact, they could none of them run a full mile without stopping. And I thought that was just plain sad, although it had been true of me most of my life, as well. I was determined to teach them the simple rules of learning how to run a mile, and I gave them some hefty prizes (up to $100 cash) if they could run a mile in under 7 minutes. And the kids who wanted to, I've given training plans to complete triathlons. Easy training plans that anyone can complete, three or four days a week, almost entirely painless workouts that slowly ramp them up. Their friends are so impressed they can do a full Olympic triathlon, but they know there's no magic in it. It's just following a plan.
It is like people who say to me that they would "do anything" to be able to play the piano. Well, guess what? No one is stopping you. If you are missing fingers, you will have difficulty. But other than that, it is only a matter of time commitment. Yes, there are plenty of people who work too many hours to devote time to playing the piano or even to the kind of athletic lifestyle I have. I understand that. But it is largely a choice. If you want something, why do you think you can't have it in the same way that I have gotten it? It isn't just piano and exercise. It is everything in life. There are a lot of things I don't know how to do. But I believe absolutely that I could figure out how to do anything. I might not love it. I might not be an expert at it. But I could do it. You just have to find the steps that take you there. A book probably has them laid out for you. Find it and read it and do it.
The people who are doing what you want to do? They started in exactly the same place that you are starting in right now. There is nothing they have that you can't get. I can't guarantee that you will have all the breaks, all the success that they do. But you can figure out how to do it. You can demystify it. And I daresay that after some 10,000 hours, you will discover that you have a few things to tell the very people you once looked up to as so far above you.
The other day, a woman stopped me at the swimming pool in the middle of a set by pulling on my feet. This is usually the signal that one is being passed. It does not happen to me very often. Actually, I can't remember the last time it happened to me. But there was a guy next to me swimming a little faster, so I thought it might be him and stopped to find this woman who wanted to know why I wore those "things" on my hands and on my feet. I told her they were called paddles and fins (or flippers) and that I bought them on line. They help me keep my body position high and they increase resistance to build up my muscles. Some days I use them more than others. I try not to become dependent on them.
Then the woman asked how many days a week I swim. I told her twice a week, that I swan about a half hour to an hour, which meant 30-70 laps. She was just astonished that I could swim so well and then she asked how old I was. I told her I was 41 and she was just more agog. In a way, this was fun, so I encouraged her to ask a few more questions. She asked if my husband was in super good shape, too. I told her he was in pretty darn good shape and that he is doing an Ironman this May. So she asked if we worked out together a lot, but I admitted that I am usually too impatient to bike with him or even run with him. We can swim together and stay the same pace, but with kids, that doesn't happen often. And so she found out I had 5 kids, too.
At the end of the conversation, she said, "I would do anything to look like you." Which is flattering, really. But also really confusing to me. It took me 8 years since the first time I worked with a trainer to do what I can do. I probably looked pretty good even after that first summer with a trainer. How do you do it? You work out every day. But you also workout smart. That means getting a training plan from someone who knows what they are doing and will help you make sure you don't get injured. If you get injured, you don't just give up. You find something else you can do to keep in shape. You sign up for races and you go out and do them, not because you are going to have any chance of winning, but because you want to challenge yourself. You spend time reading about training. There's a lot of good information on line. You don't give yourself excuses to not do your workout daily. Take Christmas off. Maybe.
It takes time and commitment, yes. But it doesn't take miracles. I am annoyed when people assume that I have always been an athlete. I haven't been. I started doing this eight years ago. I wasn't an athlete in high school. I didn't lift weights ever. If you want to look like me, all you have to do is start where I started and move up from there. It isn't mysterious. It isn't about talent. I am relatively healthy, although I struggle with sinus infections all winter long, migraines, and skin problems in winter. I also had a terrible back and bad knees before I started exercising. Some of these problems have gone away. Some are still there.
When I came home and told my kids about this conversation, they nodded and agreed with me. (And with 4 teenagers in the house, that is a pretty rare thing and I celebrate it). They all remember the summer about 6 years ago when I made them all come with me to the track and run laps three or four times a week. They all hated running the mile. In fact, they could none of them run a full mile without stopping. And I thought that was just plain sad, although it had been true of me most of my life, as well. I was determined to teach them the simple rules of learning how to run a mile, and I gave them some hefty prizes (up to $100 cash) if they could run a mile in under 7 minutes. And the kids who wanted to, I've given training plans to complete triathlons. Easy training plans that anyone can complete, three or four days a week, almost entirely painless workouts that slowly ramp them up. Their friends are so impressed they can do a full Olympic triathlon, but they know there's no magic in it. It's just following a plan.
It is like people who say to me that they would "do anything" to be able to play the piano. Well, guess what? No one is stopping you. If you are missing fingers, you will have difficulty. But other than that, it is only a matter of time commitment. Yes, there are plenty of people who work too many hours to devote time to playing the piano or even to the kind of athletic lifestyle I have. I understand that. But it is largely a choice. If you want something, why do you think you can't have it in the same way that I have gotten it? It isn't just piano and exercise. It is everything in life. There are a lot of things I don't know how to do. But I believe absolutely that I could figure out how to do anything. I might not love it. I might not be an expert at it. But I could do it. You just have to find the steps that take you there. A book probably has them laid out for you. Find it and read it and do it.
The people who are doing what you want to do? They started in exactly the same place that you are starting in right now. There is nothing they have that you can't get. I can't guarantee that you will have all the breaks, all the success that they do. But you can figure out how to do it. You can demystify it. And I daresay that after some 10,000 hours, you will discover that you have a few things to tell the very people you once looked up to as so far above you.
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