Resolutions – Show Yourself Some Grace
As 2019 comes to a close and a new year and decade is within hours, it’s common to reflect on the last year. Sadly, the moments usually remembered most are those of failure. The dreaded hall of Failed Resolutions of 2019 is well lit with shame and disgrace like the light of the refrigerator at midnight. Failing to lose a few pounds, failing to saving a little more, failing to cross something off their bucket list. As you consider your resolution for 2020, I have a few suggestions.
1. It’s good to have goals and ambitions, but be kind to yourself when you fail. Making a change takes time and pressuring yourself to reach some lofty dream by December 31, 2020 can be disheartening. So take a breath in 2020. We are our own worst critics. Don’t be a nag to yourself.
2. Instead of quantifying weight loss in pounds, focus more on eating healthier and exercising. If you lose 10 pounds unhealthily, why did you lose it? Just to say you lost 10 pounds? Maybe you can start drinking water instead of a soft drink, or walking for 10 minutes a day, or putting aside the potato chips for some grapes. Small improvements are still improvements. They may not bring drastic change, but it will bring change. A steady stream of water can erode the hardest rocks.
3. Saving can be hard, but if you gradually increase your saving capabilities it will be easier and less noticeable than hitting an impenetrable wall. During week one, put $1 in a savings account or some amount that you will not miss. Continue to do this, but periodically increase the amount. In February you may start saving $5 a week and continue to do this. Once you pick an amount, do not stop or decrease the amount. You will soon realize that you didn’t miss those few dollars. Pay yourself first. You are not first on someone else’s list.
4. Make periodic small goals, so if it takes a while to reach your ultimate goal, you will still find some satisfaction in your stepping stones. For example, if you have a goal to write a book, make goals to finish Chapter 1 by January 15th, or develop a character and plot by February. Writing an entire book is challenging, but if you reward yourself for little victories, you will keep that adrenaline to run that marathon.
5. Speaking of marathons, start small and then gradually increase the length. Whether running a race, accumulating wealth, pursuing additional education, or changing the world. Don’t try to reach your goal on January 1. You got a whole year to reach it. How do you eat a 10 lb chocolate bunny? One bite at a time. Enjoy the sweetness instead of squandering it.
6. Relationships matter, so if you are trying to squeeze in a workout instead of family time…pick family time. You can workout tomorrow, because you may not have your family tomorrow.
7. Spend less time comparing your achievements with those on Facebook and Instagram and more time looking in the mirror. At the end of the day your perception of yourself matters more than the number of Likes you receive. If you don’t like yourself, how can you expect others to like you?
8. Find what truly makes you happy. And then cling to it. Water and nurture that feeling of joy so it will grow deep roots into your soul. Roots that will stand through the tests of time.
9. Most importantly, dream. Dream for who you want to become in 2020. Dream for what you want to do in 2020. Dream for where you want 2020 to take you, not just in locale, but in all aspects. And when you think you reached it, dream some more.
Yes, 2019 may be soon over, but 2020 is waiting nearby with eager excitement. So show yourself what you got.
But if you mess up, as we always do, brush yourself off and start again. A year isn’t a failure if you are at least trying. It’s only a failure if you give up. So don’t give up!
Peace
