Be One of the Eight Percent!

We had a New year's Eve party the other night. Had a bunch of families over. The adults played cards and the kids played board games. As we grew closer to 2012, we started talking about our New Year's Resolutions. And, in walked one of the kids. Someone asked her what her resolution was for 2012. As she thought about it, her mom told her, "Don't make a resolution."

"Why not?" asked the daughter.

"Because no one ever keeps them."

I yelled out, "Don't listen to her. Be part of the 8%!"

The mom was pretty close to being right. By February 50% of resolutions have already gone out the window, and by year's end only 8% keep their resolutions. Experts all over the media tell us not to make them, since it's setting us up for failure. But, I adamantly disagree.

Look, a resolution is nothing but a is nothing more than a decision to do or not to do something. It's that easy. I decide not to smoke any more. I decide to give more to charity. Resolutions generally are good things. They often are decisions we make to help ourselves or others, to make our lives or a part of the world better.

Of course, I'm a huge advocate of the relationship resolution, where couples decide to make their relationships stronger, balanced and healthy. One of the ways I help couples with this is via my 52-Week Challenge. If you can do anything for a year, it becomes habitual. If you are interested in working on your relationship this year, why not resolve to complete the challenge as a couple?

Here's the reason why only 8 out of 100 people can keep their resolutions. They don't know how to make them. I'm going to give you a crash course in resolution success:

1. Be specific about what you want. Don't say "I'm going be more romantic with my spouse." Say, "I am going to give my spouse more hugs and kisses."

2. Give yourself a time frame. "I resolve to give my spouse 5 hugs and kisses each day."

3. Write it down. Seventy percent of us won't write down our resolutions. As a result, it's easier to let the resolution slide if it's not down in ink.

4. Revisit it regularly. It's important to go back and remind yourself what your goal was for the year.

5. Give yourself some wiggle room. If you realize that your resolution wasn't realistic, instead of 86ing it, just tweak it. Try, three kisses and hugs instead of five.

6. Don't wait for New Year's. If you have a goal for yourself don't wait until January 1st. that's just an excuse to keep doing what you are trying to change. You can create a Valentine's Day Resolution, an Arbor Day Resolution, or a Thursday resolution. Just be string and keep it. You'll be glad you did.