I Have A Message For You
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God spoke to me, and said: "You are a conduit from me to the world! You must spread my message! Tell the world they have misunderstood my nature! Tell those who claim to represent me that they got it wrong; they have been duped, and in turn they dupe their followers! Tell them that I am intelligent beyond their understanding! Tell them this universe is but one of many I choose to oversee! Tell them to listen to the truth in these words!!!"
Completely off my rocker, right? Definitely out in the cold.
God spoke to me, and said: "You are a conduit from me to the world. You must spread my message! Tell the world they have veered from the true path. Tell them that they must open their hearts to me, for I will fill them with grace and understanding. Give this message to all who would know me."
A little warmer?
God spoke to me, and said: "You are a conduit from me to the world. You must spread my message. Tell the world I sacrificed my only begotten Son to atone for the sins of man. That sacrifice must never be forgotten! Accept my Son's offer of salvation, repent of your sins! Follow Him, and you will find your place at My side in eternal joy!"
Now we're cookin'!
God spoke to me, and said: "You are a conduit from me to the world. You must spread my message. I want to correct a few errors in my book. Lord knows there are enough of them! Finding a good proof reader shouldn't be so difficult - especially for a god like me! Anyway, let's start with Matthew and Luke. That Luke, boy did he have a few flights of fancy! I only turned my back for a moment and, lo and behold, he'd got Mary literally singing my praises, while she was at Liz's place, and then he invented a completely different version of events, nothing like Matthew's. Oh, hang on...I'll have to get back to you on this. Something's just come up."
Oh dear, bridges burnt to a cinder.
Isn't it strange that Christians who believe that gods could, and do, speak to us, would probably find the middle two messages perfectly acceptable, and wouldn't question the veracity of my claim that 'God' (which they would translate to mean Yahwey - although they probably don't use the name) had spoken to me. And yet they would dismiss my claims, out of hand, with regard to the first and last messages. If I thought he existed, I'd feel sorry for Yahwey. Poor old chap has been ring-fenced. He can't say anything his followers don't want to hear. I suppose that's omnipotence for you?
By the way, if you happen to label yourself a Christian, and you are tempted to say something like, "you wouldn't say that about Muslims!" (as if that somehow invalidated what I've written?), the same thing applies to all people who believe in the existence of gods-who-can-speak-to-us. I just happen to be more familiar with Christian stuff than any of the others. Had I been born somewhere else, it's quite likely that I would be more familiar with the stuff from one of the others.
~:~
First day of 2012, and it's a Sunday. No prizes for guessing where I was this morning. Yep. In the car, in the car park, outside the church, listening to randomly selected music tracks on my phone. I was especially glad to have a pair of noise excluding ear buds today. The bloke doing the preaching was either shouting, or had the amplifier for the roof mounted speakers turned up to 11. Either way, Gillian Welch's Look At Miss Ohio (the first one out of the trap) couldn't entirely block it out, even at full volume.
I couldn't understand exactly what the preacherman was saying, because he was speaking in a language which I only know a little, but it was pretty clear he was giving his congregation a bit of an ear bashing. Was I glad when the next track turned out to be The Killing Stone by Hootie & The Blowfish. It seemed so appropriate! One might be tempted to think it was divine providence.
But not this one.
The Killing Stone by Hootie & The Blowfish
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