Day three…

Day two… Anger, hope and losing the fight.

Day three…

I think I see a pattern….

On the third day of Christmas my true love gave to me, three French hens, two turtle doves and a partridge in a pear tree.
[image error]December 27th.

On the third day of Christmas my true love gave to me, three French hens, two turtle doves and a partridge in a pear tree.

The day began bright and early and just as the sun was rising. I woke, worried that the damned turtle doves had been eaten, or escaped, or just flown away. But, no, they were happily sitting on the roof of the dove cote and they appear to have been decorating. Lovely. It's a good job you left some seed for them. It was sort of fun feeding them this morning. Scatter some seed and watch them come to eat. They are rather cute, very decorative. I suppose they'll stay as long as I keep feeding them. Would they survive if I let them go wild though? The sun, when it came up fully was gloriously bright, although still very cold. I need a large, strong coffee with my breakfast, or I'll not function through today.

Another partridge. Oven ready, vacuum packed, fair trade and humanely farmed. Not locally sourced. No bacon and no stuffing. Put it in the freezer with the other two. Now I have three frozen partridges. What if it turns out that I don't like partridge to eat? Did you think of that?

Thought not. I'm sort of impressed at the novelty of the gifts but I'm starting to see a pattern here. I really, really hope that the novelty will wear off before day six and beyond that, I think there may be repercussions.

A third pear tree. Pear wine for sure. And crumbles and pies. That's assuming they all survive and fruit. Also assuming I even get round to planting them, or even keeping them. I hadn't planned on turning the garden into an orchard of any kind, and definitely not all pears. How big do pear trees get? Aha, they should be kept trimmed to between six and eight feet in height or the weight of fruit will break the branches and kill the tree. I'll need some pruning shears at some point then, but at least they can be kept under control and at a reasonable size. I don't need a forest instead of a garden, regardless of whatever it produces. But three pear trees? Really? What are you thinking?

Doves, oh yes, that would be why the dovecote is so damned BIG. Chuck them in and hope the two already in there don't kill them. The other two are cute, by the way, very pretty and that sound they make is sweet. But did I really need any more?

French hens? Lovely! They're gorgeous, all salt and pepper dappled, dark grey and white, like a cuckoo, and so small. I thought hens would be bigger. These are bantams? Right, mini chickens that lay smaller eggs but still plenty of them. That's brilliant. Fresh eggs every day will be lovely. I've always wanted to keep chickens. I assume they are all girls? I'm not having any cockerels waking me up at stupid o'clock. I refuse to have any cockerels in my garden.

They have a coop and run too? Even better. Cute little bantams, very pretty and will lay eggs come Spring. And they'll help provide fertiliser for the garden and consume weeds too. I love this one. This gift has me grinning and skipping about happily. Practical and fun at the same time. I can't wait until Spring. Unless…. How old are they? Around twenty weeks. I see, I'm going to have to do some research on them and find out when I can expect eggs. Enormous hen house and run for three small hens, that's brilliant, they have plenty of room.

So, they're Cuckoo maran bantams, a French breed and oooh, they lay eggs with dark brown shells that look like chocolate. With them being around twenty weeks I can expect eggs from late March onwards. They'll need names. No! Roast, Pie and Curry are not an option.

But, what happens tomorrow? If there are any more pear trees then I think I may have to ask you for receipts so I can take them back. Maybe I can swap them for some other fruit trees, like apples. Maybe I can get a refund. Shame, really, because the idea was nice. Festive and a gift that keeps coming.