Today, the library is full of weird people.Usually, it's...
Today, the library is full of weird people.
Usually, it's just me and the homeless, but today there are small groups of young men wearing suits sitting in various clumps and configurations throughout the first floor. Young men dressed like bankers.
Very odd.
I have trouble getting any work done on the Book of the Dead because I am too fascinated by them. I keep walking past them, trying to snag bits of converstaion, but it is difficult because they are actually hushing their voices. Unlike the homeless, they view this place as a real library rather than a living room.
I am happy with my table today. Even though I didn't get here until almost 1 pm, I got one of the best, most out-of-the-way tables clear over by the wall, hidden by many shelves. It is so remote I could even masturbate, but won't.
That would be gross.
There are three copies of the the Egyptian Book of the Dead here and I take all three of them to my remote table. One I reject out of hand. It is a New Agey, Neo-Pagany "re-imagining". Thus, it is not the Book of the Dead at all. It's title is a lie. The other one seems to be ABOUT the Book of the Dead rather than THE Book of the Dead.
Reject.
The third is a homerun. Published in 1906, it is actually a translation of the Egyptian Book of the Dead. Immediately, I go to the index and write down all the page numbers mentioning Thoth. Then I go on the prowl again to see if I can figure out who all these young men are.
At a round table where four of them are sitting I try something different. Instead of walking by and attempting to capture a snippet or two of hushed conversation, I walk right up to them and just stand there and listen.
For a full minute.
The young men continue to talk, but then fall nervously silent. They begin looking at me.
"Hello," I say, and smile. I don't try to be, but I am an intimidating looking guy. I have been told I look "mean". Actually, I'm a pussycat who catches bugs and puts them outside instead of squishing them, but looking mean has its advantages—for example, at a biker bar or a punk rock show. Or the library.
:)
I walk away before the young men summon security. I am happy, for I got enough information to figure out what they are.
Mormons!
They are young Mormon men doing their required missionary work. How cool. Well, to be fair, they are wasting time in the library instead of doing their missionary work due to the cold weather, but still.
Mystery solved.
I go back to my remote table, grinning, back to the ancient Book of the Dead and the great god Thoth, the ibis-headed giver of magic and writing. Perhaps now I will be free to learn something.
