Calling all fanfic authors and AO3 experts

anchored-in-high-tide:

I need your help! Here’s the thing: For about two weeks now, I’ve been getting comments on my fics from one reader. So far, so good. The problem:

- the comments barely have anything to do with my writing,
- they are extremely long and detailing the commenter’s view on various topics - AND they are pretty shamelessly promoting the commenter’s own fics.

My question is: What the hell do I do with this? I’ve already told them that AO3 isn’t the best channel for a private conversation and offered contact via Tumblr (to which they didn’t respond). I’m beginning to feel super stressed out by this user but I don’t want to be mean and just tell them to stop because the comments aren’t rude or anything (on the contrary). They are just long (I’m talking 500+ words here) and dealing with personal interests and topics (none of which I have broached) that have nothing to do with my writing. Since there is no way to contact the commenter in private and save them the embarrassment of being called out in public, I have literally no idea what to do. I always respond to all my comments but I don’t even know where to start with these ones.
Someone please tell me how to handle this without hurting anyone’s feelings :(

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Hey, so sorry to be responding so late! I just saw this randomly on my newsfeed; somehow the tag didn’t show up in my activity at all! 

Yeah, so, this has happened to me a few times before, too, and it’s always sort of a… “bzuh? What am I supposed to do with that??” feeling. I would say - well, okay, let me back up: first and foremost, you’re not obligated to respond at all. I think it’s basic courtesy for an author to respond to comments, but if those comments are off-topic, abusive, nasty, or just a waste of your time in whatever way, you do not owe that commenter your time. If it’s nasty, straight up delete that shit. I used to, no matter how upset I was, answer every comment, no matter how any of those things it was, but finally came to see that I really don’t owe anyone my time. Think of it this way: you’ve already donated your time, passion, creative sweat and toil, and given your creation to this fandom community of ours. Responding to commenters is kind, but only when they’re using coutresy as a basis for their side of the interaction to start with! Just a few days ago, I had two commenters ganging up on me in the comments of my own story. I don’t need that in my life, and none of us who already write for people for free, out of the goodness of our hearts and an assumed shared passion for these characters and worlds we write about, are in any way obligated to waste our time on people who are wasting our time, draining our emotional energy, costing us mental and emotional health, or anything else along those lines. 

My bottom line advice is: respond if you want. Don’t feel like you have to, though. You’ve already suggested an alternative venue for off-topic discussion and it wasn’t taken. Personally, I would respond to anything to do with the story and simply ignore the rest of it. It’s your call, but it sounds like it’s bothering you. Don’t let it. You’ve already given, and given a lot!