Just what we need...more whining on the internet.
I have a finished book here. Well, mostly finished. It still needs revision, but for the most part it's a book.
Normally at this point I'd be doing everything I could to get it ready to send out to the agents/publishers. I'd be drafting the dreaded query letter. I'd be filled with a sense of hope, that this one would actually see traditional publication.
I should be excited. I should be hopeful. Mostly, what I feel is apathetic.
There's the nagging fear that this one will go nowhere too. That after all is said and done I won't be any farther ahead than I was 10 years ago when I started on this writing journey. Most of the friends that started when I did have already seen publication. I just have this oppressive feeling that nothing will ever change for me no matter how hard I try. My experience in life is that I've had to work twice as hard as everyone, and be twice as good, just to break even. (And I'm not just talking writing here.) And let's face it, nobody ever hears about the ones who gave it their all and died without ever realising their dream.
You know what? I can't even remember the last time I had a bit of good news--news related to me personally--especially writing related news.
I haven't even looked at Tasha since I completed it about a month ago, and while everyone says you should give it some time to breathe before diving into revisions, I'm not doing it for the right reasons.
And damn, I don't even know if traditional publishing is the way to go now. The marketplace has changed so much just in the last year that maybe my dream is obsolete. It's all so damn confusing and convoluted that I'm not even sure what to wish for anymore.
All I can do is sit here plugging away at the day job, struggle for words, keep writing, keep reading, keep trying. Because, barring incredible luck, no one ever made it by quitting. And I'll never be happy with the way things are…with having a dream and never realising it. I can not be content with failure.
Am I even making sense here? Do other writers feel this way?
Normally at this point I'd be doing everything I could to get it ready to send out to the agents/publishers. I'd be drafting the dreaded query letter. I'd be filled with a sense of hope, that this one would actually see traditional publication.
I should be excited. I should be hopeful. Mostly, what I feel is apathetic.
There's the nagging fear that this one will go nowhere too. That after all is said and done I won't be any farther ahead than I was 10 years ago when I started on this writing journey. Most of the friends that started when I did have already seen publication. I just have this oppressive feeling that nothing will ever change for me no matter how hard I try. My experience in life is that I've had to work twice as hard as everyone, and be twice as good, just to break even. (And I'm not just talking writing here.) And let's face it, nobody ever hears about the ones who gave it their all and died without ever realising their dream.
You know what? I can't even remember the last time I had a bit of good news--news related to me personally--especially writing related news.
I haven't even looked at Tasha since I completed it about a month ago, and while everyone says you should give it some time to breathe before diving into revisions, I'm not doing it for the right reasons.
And damn, I don't even know if traditional publishing is the way to go now. The marketplace has changed so much just in the last year that maybe my dream is obsolete. It's all so damn confusing and convoluted that I'm not even sure what to wish for anymore.
All I can do is sit here plugging away at the day job, struggle for words, keep writing, keep reading, keep trying. Because, barring incredible luck, no one ever made it by quitting. And I'll never be happy with the way things are…with having a dream and never realising it. I can not be content with failure.
Am I even making sense here? Do other writers feel this way?
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