“I hated going out with them because something would always...

“I hated going out with them because something would always happen.  It was usually on birthdays and special occasions.  I was painfully shy, but they weren’t shy at all.  They’d scream at each other in restaurants.  He’d never hit her in public because he was smarter than that.  He’d save that until we got home.  I felt like a soldier growing up.  Even the quiet times were stressful, because things could go wrong at any moment.  One time he chased her around the house with a knife.  Another time he broke her finger.  We’d always go to my grandmother’s house after the big incidents.  Those were the calmest times of my life.  But after a few weeks he’d always show up with flowers, and Mom would say: ‘OK, we’re going back.’  I tried to tell her that it wasn’t just her.  That we were suffering too.  But her answer was always the same:  ‘We can’t survive on our own.  And he doesn’t do it to you.’  Things changed once I started going to college.  I became more confident.  I felt powerful for the first time in my life.  I packed his bags.  I took his house keys.  I went to court, filed the forms, and served him myself.  Mom’s doing much better now.  She looks twenty years younger. She’s going out with friends again.  She’s taking theater classes.  And I just finished my first year of law school.”
(Toronto, Canada)