What to do When a Writing Critique Hurts

by DiAnn Mills @DiAnnMills

We writers are a passionate, emotional group. While these traits help us create beautifully worded fiction and non-fiction, nothing slashes the heart deeper than a harsh critique of our work.We might catch ourselves thinking:“Even an idiot would get this.”“What? You’ve got to be kidding?”“Obviously, my style doesn’t suit you. Too bad. You’re missing out.”
Don’t get all self-righteous on me. We’ve all thought and said the above. Hopefully we didn’t contact the reader and blast him/her. We all learn from our mistakes. 
Never hurts to be reminded what we post online, stays online. 
Not every person reads our creations the same way. We are a diverse people with opinions and views, and ideas. Once a writer understands the freedom of perspective, we are also free to write our brand and what is on our heart about the subject. 
The only attitude we can project is the reader is always right—even when the person isn’t. How do we handle those anger-filled, bitter, and hurtful comments?
Below are a few ideas that will help us maintain our professionalism with poise and respect for ourselves and the reader who made a blunt statement.
What do do When a Writing Critique Hurts1. Know the difference between a critique and a criticism.Critique: an analysis of a literary work.Criticism: the disapproval of a literary work based on the person’s                                interpretation or regard of the contents’ faults or errors.
2. The criticism isn’t about you personally but what has been written. 
3. Don’t respond to the critique in the heat of the moment. Give yourself time to process. Don’t get involved in an argument.If the review is vicious or has insulted your integrity, ignore. Delete                              if possible.If the review simply hurt our feelings, be gracious and thank the                                   reader for their feedback.
4. Read the assessment carefully. Are any of the comments valuable? Do we need to make changes if not in this piece but in the next? Is this an opportunity to grow as a writer?
5. Consider seeking guidance from others in the publishing industry who are highly respected.
6. In some situations an offer to refund the person’s money may be in order, but be careful in choosing that alternative.
7. Refuse to quit!  
Honestly, I choose not to my reviews, and here’s my reason. If they’re good, I’m afraid I’ll get a swelled head. If they’re bad, I’ll cry for six months. I’m confident my editor will let me know if I need to be aware of a pitfall or a triumph.
What is your best method of handling a harsh critique?
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Thoughts on handling a harsh #writing critique - @DiAnnMills on @EdieMelson (Click to Tweet)
DiAnn Mills is a bestselling author who believes her readers should expect an adventure. Her titles have appeared on the CBA and ECPA bestseller lists; won two Christy Awards; and been finalists for the RITA, Daphne Du Maurier, Inspirational Readers’ Choice, and Carol award contests. Firewall, the first book in her Houston: FBI series, was listed by Library Journal as one of the best Christian Fiction books of 2014.
DiAnn is a founding board member of the American Christian Fiction Writers, a member of Advanced Writers and Speakers Association, Suspense Sister, and International Thriller Writers. She is co-director of The Blue Ridge Mountain Christian Writers Conference and The Author Roadmap with social media specialist Edie Melson. She teaches writing workshops around the country.
DiAnn is very active online and would love to connect with readers on Facebook: www.facebook.com/diannmills, Twitter: https://twitter.com/diannmills or any of the social media platforms listed at www.diannmills.com.