Banished from your family? Invent your own

[image error]Today is Yom Kippur, the Jewish Day of Atonement. Not that I have anything to atone for. My book isn't even a bestseller, and I owe a shitload of taxes, and I still can't find my Leica camera. So personally, I think G-d should just give me a pass and inscribe me in The Book of Life–which, last I checked, hasn't hit The New York Times bestseller list, either. This marks the second holiday since my book has come out that it would be a leeetle awkward to have dinner with my family. So last...