A day in the life of a Standards Sgt

Tough morning. The Warrants and Senior Staff in Standards where I work made us all breakfast this morning: scrambled eggs, bacon, sausage, beans, and toast. Of course they took this opportunity to give a speech or two. (Nothing is free.)

Major: I'd just like to say a few words, not to step on the Warrant's toes. (Gives speech)
Me: Gee, you didn't swear nearly as much as the Warrant did.

Major: The Commanding Officer is really impressed with all our accomplishments and the hard work that has been done in his absence.
Me: Maybe he should go away more often?

Seriously, I don't know why I haven't been charged, or at least gotten extras.