why i'm changing how i pray and how it's changing me

For me praying is how I survive. Prayer has pulled me through panic attacks, anxiety, long nights of fear and questioning when my brain refuses to shut down, through crying fests and pity parties and nuclear meltdowns when I screamed at the world.
Prayer has been my rock.
I need my God to get me through. 
But sometimes I don't have faith to pray.
Faith to pray for specifics.
Faith to pray beyond generalities.
Faith to pray for what my heart longs for but is too afraid to ask.
Faith to pray for...