Monday Mindset

It’s Monday ….

And I’m crabby. I mean the fact people are breathing is ticking me off. Why am I so unrealistically angry/crabby?

The weather. It’s May 20th. I’m wearing a fisherman’s sweater and a flannel shirt – that’s to sit inside. I have to put on a jacket to go outside. Because it’s 35 degrees!!!!! No, I don’t live in the Antarctic with cute penguins. This is Michigan. If I’m going to be this cold, I want penguins and polar bears in my back yard (yes I know they live on opposite ends of the world but I need a reason to enjoy this weather)
My personal life is all sorts of out of whack. I can’t find any kind of balance… with writing/Charlie/side hustle/new eating/sleep – the list goes on.
I have person in my life that aren’t doing their part and that makes things harder because in this case I can’t just let the things fall.

I want doughnuts…I want vodka…I want PEACE.

While I can’t in a positive mindset eat doughnuts with a vodka chaser, I can find peace.

First, I need to get over the weather thing…. Being so cold means I can table unpacking spring/summer clothes for another week freeing me up for edits.

Second, I need to remind myself that balance is myth like a calorie free doughnut that is good for diabetics. I need to block my time so I have a ‘direct’ focus, so I don’t wallow. When I’ve blocked writing, write. When I’m loving Charlie, love my grandbaby. Get over the dieting thing. It’s life.

Third, and the hardest. This person is someone I have cared about, that I have tried to help, but in the end, it is destroying me and my grandson. So, I need to realize that the unicorns are really skunks and the storm clouds aren’t covering a rainbow.  And I know once I’ve closed this chapter the other two will become manageable.

Now just because I’m blogging about it and know what has to happen everything will be okay – it’s going to take a minute to end it. There are some legal things I need to do. I need to know it will get even uglier before it gets better. But I also know that peace will

never be mine until this is handled but I also know that slivers of peace will come with each step. Knowing that I’m evicting this soul sucking leech from our life.

On the happier side