Middle Class Indie CuntTo be meIs to be a fucking nobody,I’m not gay,I’m not...
To be me
Is to be a fucking nobody,
I’m not gay,
I’m not trans
I’m not a feminist,
I’m not a woman,
I’m not a white Knight
Who dies every lifetime
in the valley of arrows
I’m not even a grown man,
And I think I may be racist
I’ve lived in the same country for so long,
I can feel the corruption
Rasping between every breath I take,
I’m not political
And I fear that gives me power
That others believe does not exist,
I’m not under observation,
And that seems to bother me
On a level of disgust
And misunderstanding of the world
That I will never begin to see,
I’m not in love
And that makes me want to fuck everything I see,
Like an uncontrolled urge
That has never slept
But twisted it’s way into every word I say
It may be the truth I speak
But the venom is never diluted
For the sake of anyone else’s sensitivity,
For I will live as long as I’m remembered,
A hated person
By the ones he loved the most,
If only they knew what he really thought of them,
Mindless objects of his darkest fascination,
Thoughtless voices groaning in the past,
Mirrors of himself shattering beneath his ego,
I’m not angry though it feels like it,
It’s a tool to penetrate the cave
A little deeper,
Exhausting and yet illuminating
A part of me that travels
Beside my struggle to keep digging,
And to keep my mind above the sinking depressions,
The tiniest of doubts
Shakes the roof
And my soul,
Will I make it to the end
Before I die,
Will I have time to give it a title
And the luxury to let it go?
I will take the plunge,
Lay myself at the world’s feet,
To shed the skin I was clothed in
To disembark from a vessel
I had no intention of boarding,
I now find myself,
lost and at the mercy of,
The beginning of humility.
