What Do We Do When Our Stories Collide?
Choosing to be Kind and Gracious
by @bethvogt
Two stories collided the other day – and erupted in kindness and grace.
The collision played out on national TV during a morning news show, and so I wonder if most people viewed it as merely news, overlooking the exchange of kindheartedness and graciousness.
Allow me to recount the story for you:
On Monday, April 22, two disparate stories played out on the Today Show:
Meteorologist Dylan Dreyer shared her struggle with miscarriage and secondary infertility.
News anchor Jenna Bush Hager announced she was 5 ½ months pregnant with her third child.
It was revealed later that neither woman knew what the other one was going to say that morning. Hager’s announcement was a surprise – the timing was based on the fact she and her husband had told their two daughters she was pregnant the day before. Dreyer’s news segment coincided with National Infertility Awareness Week. And so, their stories collided in a very public way: One woman discussing her sorrow and loss and longing for another child. Another woman celebrating an unexpected pregnancy.
Of course, social media – Twitter and Instagram – lit up with people responding to both women’s stories. But one of the first comments I read was shockingly negative, shaming Hager for sharing her pregnancy news on the same day Dreyer talked about her infertility.
What?
Yes, at first, the timing for the two stories could seem awkward at best, even insensitive. But it was also an honest view of real life. How we can be dealing with one thing – a joy-filled occasion – and be unaware that the person next to us can be grieving. And the other person can be our close friend.
The truth is, Hager understands Dreyer’s heartache because she’s experienced the pain of infertility, too.
Here’s the beautiful part of this story … the part I keep thinking about. How Dreyer and Hager responded to one another as friends who know and love one another. As friends who respect each other’s story. As they discussed how the pregnancy and infertility intertwined on Monday morning in front of thousands of TV viewers, Dreyer said, “Your joy doesn’t add to my sadness.”
How kind. How gracious. How understanding.
So often our story collides with someone else’s story and we may never realize it. But when the intertwining happens in such a way that we know … that we see the reaction or we have a chance to respond … may we choose kindness. May we choose grace.
We can decide to think the worst of someone else, or we can choose to think better of them. We can pause and realize that, in the midst of someone’s joy, they can also recognize and have room to embrace our pain. We can understand that a time of celebration does not mean someone will overlook our heartache. The one does not preclude the other – not in the presence of a true friend.
What Do We Do When Our Stories Collide? Choosing to Be Kind and Gracious http://bit.ly/2PsO4Ge #friendship #bekind
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'Your joy doesn't add to my sadness' quote by @DylanDreyerNBC @JennaBushHager http://bit.ly/2PsO4Ge #NationalInfertilityAwarenessWeek #friendship
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'What wisdom can you find that is greater than kindness?' quote by Jean-Jacques Rousseau http://bit.ly/2PsO4Ge #bekind #relationships
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