Carlie's Chapter 9 - Dear Tiger: I Don't Think I'm Human Anymore
LAST WEEK, Tiger revealed he knew where Simone's parents and old classmate were. This week, Simone reveals that the company has discovered her psi abilities and is monitoring her with a psi of their own.Chapter 9 –Visits from the Psi
Dear TT,
I would love to dance with you, but I’m in trouble. I couldn’t hide the mind-reading from the company psi. I’m not sure I could hide anything from her. She came with the doctors, and I was curious.I mean, I could hear the other doctors coming down the corridor, but I couldn’t hear her. I could tell she was there. She was this presence. I tried to reach out and touch her mind, but it was like her mind wasn’t there.There were no thoughts. I couldn’t even sense emotion.I’m sorry if this is coming as a bit of a surprise to you, Tiges, but I didn’t want to write about it. Writing about it made it all too real, and who wants to make being this kind of different real, right?Anyway, I knew something was coming, but I didn’t know what. I shut everything down that they might find in the computer, moved files and erased them from where I’d had them. Broke links and blocked routing. I didn’t bother with the keyboard. I just plugged my head into the data stream and went to work.Thing was, I forgot to set an alarm for the door.Tiges. She was standing right behind me for the last part. Right. Behind. Me. I don’t know what she saw. I don’t even know how much she could see inside my head, before she came into the room.What if my head is like everyone else’s? What if a good psi can just pull whatever they want out of it, without me even knowing that’s what they’re doing?I’m scared, Tiger.She’s been visiting me every day. She never says anything about what I do with the computer, so I think maybe I’m safe to send you this, but I’ll be quick, and I’ll break everything down as soon as I’m finished. She makes me do mind exercises the whole time she’s here.She doesn’t talk much—just enough to tell me what to do—and she hasn’t told me her name. That doesn’t seem very fair, Tiges. Her knowing my name, and me not knowing hers. I wonder why that is.You’re the psi doctor. Why d’you think that is?No, that’s not fair. You’re not really a doctor; I know that. I’m sorry.Anyway. Good work with finding Marrietta. I’m still dreaming about her, but I can’t make much sense of it. Sometimes it’s like she’s awake and she’s hunting. Why would she be hunting? She’s human.But her thoughts are full of hunger, and blood, and death, and something called The Blade. She needs to find The Blade so she can progress. Her head is full of it.And she doesn’t even know what it looks like.I don’t get it, Tiges. She used to just be full of herself. All she’d talk about was the next excursion, and how she could show this person or that where to find the best hairdressers, or the nicest fashions or foods. Now, I think she’d rather eat the hairdresser, and turn the dress into lining for her den. Everything seems to be food or sleep to her.It’s weird, but she makes me feel more human than I ever did.And she can see in the dark.That’s why they have the night cycle. It helps them develop their dark-sight, or whatever it is they use to see when there’s no light. The hunting is why they have the complex. I don’t think they let anyone out of that. At least, I don’t think they have, yet. I think the alterations they send to the complex all go through this stage of being a pure hunter.If what was happening to me was scary, Tiges, it’s nothing to what Marrietta’s going through.I don’t want to go through that, but I can’t help feeling that I might have to.I mean, Marrietta and the others were exposed to the same thing I was, right?Well, they’re hunters.Why aren’t I a hunter? Is it because I’m a psi? Is that why?Did that stuff get into my head instead?Can you tell what’s so different between Marrietta and me?But I forget. You’re in this mess just as much as I am, and that’s my fault. I’m sorry for dragging you into this, and I’m sorry, because I don’t know how to get you out of it. Maybe it would be better if you didn’t write to me for a while. Safer.Until I can get in touch with you, again.I have a psi who visits me every day, and that can’t be safe.I love you, Tiges.I wish I’d told you before, but I didn’t want to say goodbye.
S.-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
The complete series is available as short, individual ebooks, and will become available as an omnibus, later this year. In the meantime, you can find them on this blog, until one week after the last chapter in the last book of the series has been posted, at which point this series will be taken down, and a new series serialised on site.
books2read.com/u/4Awrze
books2read.com/u/mgrxdR
books2read.com/u/4DoG8D
books2read.com/u/b5Mng1
books2read.com/u/3GYBla
books2read.com/u/4782k8
Dear TT,I would love to dance with you, but I’m in trouble. I couldn’t hide the mind-reading from the company psi. I’m not sure I could hide anything from her. She came with the doctors, and I was curious.I mean, I could hear the other doctors coming down the corridor, but I couldn’t hear her. I could tell she was there. She was this presence. I tried to reach out and touch her mind, but it was like her mind wasn’t there.There were no thoughts. I couldn’t even sense emotion.I’m sorry if this is coming as a bit of a surprise to you, Tiges, but I didn’t want to write about it. Writing about it made it all too real, and who wants to make being this kind of different real, right?Anyway, I knew something was coming, but I didn’t know what. I shut everything down that they might find in the computer, moved files and erased them from where I’d had them. Broke links and blocked routing. I didn’t bother with the keyboard. I just plugged my head into the data stream and went to work.Thing was, I forgot to set an alarm for the door.Tiges. She was standing right behind me for the last part. Right. Behind. Me. I don’t know what she saw. I don’t even know how much she could see inside my head, before she came into the room.What if my head is like everyone else’s? What if a good psi can just pull whatever they want out of it, without me even knowing that’s what they’re doing?I’m scared, Tiger.She’s been visiting me every day. She never says anything about what I do with the computer, so I think maybe I’m safe to send you this, but I’ll be quick, and I’ll break everything down as soon as I’m finished. She makes me do mind exercises the whole time she’s here.She doesn’t talk much—just enough to tell me what to do—and she hasn’t told me her name. That doesn’t seem very fair, Tiges. Her knowing my name, and me not knowing hers. I wonder why that is.You’re the psi doctor. Why d’you think that is?No, that’s not fair. You’re not really a doctor; I know that. I’m sorry.Anyway. Good work with finding Marrietta. I’m still dreaming about her, but I can’t make much sense of it. Sometimes it’s like she’s awake and she’s hunting. Why would she be hunting? She’s human.But her thoughts are full of hunger, and blood, and death, and something called The Blade. She needs to find The Blade so she can progress. Her head is full of it.And she doesn’t even know what it looks like.I don’t get it, Tiges. She used to just be full of herself. All she’d talk about was the next excursion, and how she could show this person or that where to find the best hairdressers, or the nicest fashions or foods. Now, I think she’d rather eat the hairdresser, and turn the dress into lining for her den. Everything seems to be food or sleep to her.It’s weird, but she makes me feel more human than I ever did.And she can see in the dark.That’s why they have the night cycle. It helps them develop their dark-sight, or whatever it is they use to see when there’s no light. The hunting is why they have the complex. I don’t think they let anyone out of that. At least, I don’t think they have, yet. I think the alterations they send to the complex all go through this stage of being a pure hunter.If what was happening to me was scary, Tiges, it’s nothing to what Marrietta’s going through.I don’t want to go through that, but I can’t help feeling that I might have to.I mean, Marrietta and the others were exposed to the same thing I was, right?Well, they’re hunters.Why aren’t I a hunter? Is it because I’m a psi? Is that why?Did that stuff get into my head instead?Can you tell what’s so different between Marrietta and me?But I forget. You’re in this mess just as much as I am, and that’s my fault. I’m sorry for dragging you into this, and I’m sorry, because I don’t know how to get you out of it. Maybe it would be better if you didn’t write to me for a while. Safer.Until I can get in touch with you, again.I have a psi who visits me every day, and that can’t be safe.I love you, Tiges.I wish I’d told you before, but I didn’t want to say goodbye.
S.-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
The complete series is available as short, individual ebooks, and will become available as an omnibus, later this year. In the meantime, you can find them on this blog, until one week after the last chapter in the last book of the series has been posted, at which point this series will be taken down, and a new series serialised on site.
books2read.com/u/4Awrze
books2read.com/u/mgrxdR 
books2read.com/u/4DoG8D
books2read.com/u/b5Mng1
books2read.com/u/3GYBla
books2read.com/u/4782k8
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