The Scourge Of The Orange Jacket

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Okay, I know you think I’m a whiner because I went off on this guy wearing an orange jacket, sitting right in the middle of a shot I wanted to take during cherry blossom season at Shinjuku Gyōen. I mean, one guy, minding his own business – so what if his head’s inside his phone instead of looking around at the incredible clouds of beauteous pinkitude and noticing that other people (okay, me) might want to take a photo without HIM AND HIS ORANGE JACKET smack in the middle of it?


I’m not saying you’re not entitled to your opinion, but this orange jacket pestilence, I swear, it’s not just real, it’s everywhere!


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No matter how far you travel (on an all-day bus tour to Hanamiyama in Fukushima, for example)…


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…no matter what the weather (way the freakin’ freak in northiest Aomori-ken)…


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…there are people wearing ORANGE JACKETS. I mean, did you even notice the thousand-year-old cherry tree in the background? Not before your attention was hijacked by those two jacketbombers in front of it, I bet


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Sometimes there are whole families of them


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Sometimes they travel in packs


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And they obviously paid no attention to the travel advisory about confining the mayhem to cherry blossom season


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You’d think the tulips at Showa Kinen Park could hold their own, but no


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The real pros surf the circuit, ruining photos at Unesco World Heritage sites in the off-season


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Pushers of orange jackets set up shop distressingly close to known flower-viewing sites


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And tragically enough, you’re never too young to begin the training



When not ranting maniacally about subjects of grave import, Jonelle Patrick writes novels set in Tokyo


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A young woman dressed as a Gothic Lolita is found dead in a car with two strangers. But the more Yumi Hata learns about her friend’s death, the more she’s convinced it was murder…read more


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Published on April 01, 2019 15:53
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