“I was twenty-one when my son was born. I was working at...

“I was twenty-one when my son was born.  I was working at McDonald’s.  And it was nothing but horse farms and cabbage patches in our town.  His mother and I tried to work it out, but eventually I moved to Philadelphia.  Could I have been more present?  Yes.  But it’s not as easy as: ‘Hey, I’m going to be there no matter what.’  A lot of sacrifices are required to be present in someone’s life: unhappy relationships, no name towns, low-paying jobs.  I didn’t want to work at a mill or a warehouse my entire life.  I wanted to do something in music.  Or work in a high rise with executives.  Or form my own company.  Incremental changes weren’t going to get me there.  I had to make a big jump.  I had to leave.  And I thought he’d be OK.  There was a lot of support around him.  I’d call on the phone to check on school.  I’d come back once a month, pick him up, and go out for the day.  And the decision certainly allowed me to provide more, especially later in life.  I work in television now.  I’ve introduced him to celebrities.  I’ve brought him to award shows.  I paid for his expensive music school.  But there are definitely some resentment and abandonment issues.  He has trouble making friends. He’d rather be playing piano than going to parties.  He’s a bit like a hermit in the mountains.  And recently he’s made some pretty deliberate comments that seem aimed at me.  Like: ‘I haven’t seen this person in awhile, so they don’t care.’  Or ‘Nobody’s going to come to my recital, so it doesn’t matter.’  These are issues that I have to resolve.  And I’m trying.  But I still can’t say I regret my decision to leave.  I think it was the correct choice.  But I also have to own that the choice probably changed him for life.”