Lesson learned
Since the release of
You Know How To Love Me
, I've learned a lot about my readers. This is long, but I need to get it off my chest.
Prior to publishing the book, I posted questions in a few of the interracial romance groups on Facebook. I explained that this book was the third in the series, and the character of Chelsea had become known to readers in Books 1 and 2, so her story came about organically. I wanted to know what they liked and what they didn't like in the books they read. This is what I posted, and these were some of the comments I received. Names have been removed to protect the privacy of the commenters. "I have a question for the readers in the group. I noticed that most of the IR romances I see are WM/BW. At the moment I'm working on Book 3 in my series which features a character from Book 2, a white woman involved with a black man. Of course, this isn't anything new in our community, but I'd like to know what you'd love or hate to see in a BM/WW romance. Are there any things I should avoid? Please be honest. I REALLY need to know before I get too far into this story. Thank you!”
* * * * * * *
"As long as he is not abusive I don't see any problem. I know this is not a problem in your work."
"In my own understanding, IR means the main characters are from different races. The sub-genre of IR are many; BW/WM, BM/WW etc.
From my own personal experience as an authors, readers prefer to see a BM on the cover rather than a white woman.
What do I hate as a reader? The excess focus on race as if that's the only thing the book is. We should grasp the whole racial thing as the story unfolds, not the main focus as if it is forced down our throats.
"However, be prepared that you may get flack from some readers who think IR is only BWWM."
"You are absolutely right. However, many readers have a very narrow definition of what constitutes IR romance. I've read comments from readers who claim that only BWWM is IR--the rest, according to them, is multicultural. I don't agree with them, but that is how many readers think. I've also read comments from readers on Goodreads who say they are not interested in reading about black men falling in love with white women because they already see this "in real life" whereas, for them, BWWM is the fantasy. Again, I don't agree with them, but this is what I've read in groups on Goodreads.
"As long as he is not derogatory towards black women. That's more common than a white man with a black woman.
"I think the same rules apply, too many times BM/WW books are treated as a fetish instead of Romance. The woman is black curious and then at the end might be surprised they care about this creature or oddity. My men are educated, not thugs because I hate that stereotype for black men. Treat it as you would a WMBW romance. That’s what I do for all of mine. The skin color only affects the outside world looking in but the relationship is the safe bubble where all that matters is how the people involved treat each other."
"Personally, I don't mind a long as the characters are real and well-developed. It would be refreshing to read. I prefer bwwm, only because that's how I began my journey. I'd like to believe that I am somewhat open-minded (not fully), as long as the supporting characters are not cast in a negative light. You know, the stereotypical "black bitch". I hope this helps. This comes from years of reading."
"Just make it realistic."
"I would like to see her willing to get know his family without being overly afraid. Apprehensive perhaps, but not terrified. I would also like to see her stand up for herself and be a partner to him. The two of them ride or die without going over the top."
"Just have fun with it. In one of mine the brother brought home a ww. Mom's reaction was 'Please tell me your son did NOT just bring me home a white girl.' This she said to her own white husband. LOL! Ppl will always have something negative to say, so don't let that worry you. Just write what you'd like to read."
"I'm invested in your character so as long as you stay true to Chelsea and her bohemian ways, it will be fine."
"In real life I have no issues with it. But I wouldn't read it."
"I'm all for IR romances, but I hate reading scenes where there's a racist family or friend. I went through that, and when I read a book, I want to escape the reality...."
"I never buy the WW/BM books!"
"Honestly, I wouldn't read it either and no offense but its because I can't dream or envisions myself vicariously in the story as the heroine. It's why I stay with BWWM."
* * * * * *
I guess I should've paid more attention to the negative comments than the positive ones, because this book bombed! It had probably one-quarter of the amount of sales I normally have in the first forty-five days after release.
I was so outdone, I went to my online writer's group to get their take on it.
* * * * * *"To be added to my "Never Do That Again" list - writing a book with a black hero and white heroine. Sales of YOU KNOW HOW TO LOVE ME aren't even half of what I normally sell of a new release in the first 45 days. :( Even though the story came about organically from the previous book in the series, apparently black women refuse to read about the BM/WW pairing. They're okay with a white hero and black heroine, though. #Weird #History #LessonLearned"These were some of the author comments:
"I don’t think it’s a matter of can’t. They just don’t want to. If they are avid romance readers they are probably done reading about white women getting their HEA."
"Yeah, successful black men dating and marrying white women is a sensitive subject for a lot black women.
"I know there are black women who will and have read white women written by white women but turn their noses at black women who write white women, it doesn't bother me. Especially if the black author also writes a healthy balance of black women. I hope their ethnicity is clear but even when I've clearly described a character, some one manages to feel it is ambiguous, which it never is. My cover will usually show the woman."
"I think I'm a bit sadistic. I loved watching that pale heroine grovel and adjust. Lmao. It was epic. But, she got her HEA and worked hard for it. Lmao"
"That might be what it is. They sad and desperate. OMGosh, that sounds like me. Desperate. I don't read contemporary romance with white women. They have options."
"I know all white women don't live charmed lives. I'm an admin for a special needs mom group that's 95% white. They struggle, but to answer your question, no. It's been more than 25 or so years since I've cared about a white woman being happy."
"I was thinking that would fail. Sorry. I have zero interest in reading that. Sorry it didn't work, Chicki."
"This is so interesting to me. For me, I just love a good story that keeps me engaged. I've had a YA novel idea tugging at me for a minute, where the BW is torn between a BM & WM. Now it makes me wonder...."
"It might work for YA though. That market is still hopeful about race relations."
"The younger generation isn't as bitter, and they might have no problem with it."
"There was an interracial romance as one of the story lines in my book that developed organically. But I was careful to draw my readers in and not set up expectations or reasons why they should reject the book before reading it, bc it was really about a woman’s internal journey & the romance with her white Co-worker who was her only work ally was just a side development that added complexity to the story and actually made the characters deal with the subject of racism. The cover and intro to the story didn’t set people up to unfairly make assumptions about my story or the characters. Unfortunately your cover likely did you in, not the story itself. Folks likely made assumptions based on the cover rather than the cover opening up questions they wanted to find answers to. With more controversial subject matter, sometimes we have to go subtle in our marketing so people won’t close themselves to the essence of a story they would likely enjoy if they gave it a chance."
"I wonder if your sales would have been higher if the cover was different and/or you had marketed this book to white women. Black women don't necessarily want to read about a white woman and a black man, but white women who fantasize about such things would. In marketing to white women, I think you would have had to change the cover though."
"You actually don’t have to do that. Just market it in a way that your targeted audience won’t reject it before reading it. Trust me - I’ve done well writing a diverse array of characters, though my protagonists are always Black women. Think about Silence of the Lambs - as much as people were repulsed by Hannibal Lechter, they were riveted by him and actually liked him. If they weren’t subtle and enticing in their marketing, folks wouldn’t have been as willing to engage with the story. But once they engaged, they were all in. Folks will accept and savor what you write if you give it to them honestly and in a way that connects with their humanity - and if your marketing doesn’t lead them to negative assumptions. Last analogy - I didn’t expect to enjoy Hidden Figures bc the ads were so hokey - saw it only bc I would feel guilty not to support it. And it was excellent, not just bc I related to it, but also from a storytelling, acting, production perspective as well. It fully deserved to be in the best picture race - and from a writing perspective was better than La La Land and Moonlight, the two front runners. But I easily could have missed seeing it bc the marketing didn’t compel me and led me to make false assumptions about the worthiness of the story."
"I just hate for any writer to censor their own work - what I meant by that earlier comment had nothing to do with your content. The negative assumption I was referring to is that black women may think they don’t want to read about the romance portrayed but once they start reading it really like the book. Though if that wasn’t your experience - if they panned it after reading it rather than just rejecting it outright bc they assumed they didn’t like it, I suppose it’s up to you as to whether you want to bend to popular whims or just write what you feel like writing. Sometimes writers bring people along in their thinking and expand people’s minds. But if it’s a purely numbers calculation on how you want to spend your time and resources, I suppose you have to weigh that as a factor."
"Remember Harper Lee didn’t win friends in her hometown writing To Kill A Mockingbird. She ended up bringing a whole lot of southern readers along in their thinking."
CB: "I was hoping to do that, but if people don't buy the book they won't get to read the story. LOL!
"I spent yesterday looking up WW/BM novels yesterday and guess what I found: mess! The one that stands out the most was this book about a white woman who worked in loss prevention and intentionally framed black men for theft they didn’t commit so she could trick them into sleeping with her to get off. It’s the way they ogle our men and think up SICK mess like that that I can’t stand. And it’s the way I see black men constantly leave and DEBASE black women and then go choose white women. And I see these same white women go on to further debase black women and make them feel even more worthless because they were chosen and we were not. Real life. I’ve read these exchanges and it makes me sick....
So it’s not a bitterness. It’s not that we don’t want to see white women happy. We don’t care because while they’re out there being happy, a lot of black women are still finding their own. And that’s why I personally feel triggered by stories about that."
"For whatever it's worth, I think you were very brave to write/promote this, Chicki and I admired you for it. There's was no question in my mind that it would be a well written and engaging story but the fact that you went out on a limb was courageous. I one clicked because of that as much as the writing."
Wow! I just wish my dear author friends had given me a heads up during the six month that I was writing and promoting the book before it was released.
There have been a few reviews that made me smile, though. This is one of them.
5.0 out of 5 stars Beautifully written
January 8, 2019
Format: Kindle EditionI love how the author gives us inside in the mind of a white girl . I must admit that I sometimes despise a brother with a good job choosing a white girl instead of a sister. But once I read this book it gave me another mindset at the end of the day you're choosing who you love no matter the skin color. Thanks for opening my eyes." - IAB74
Prior to publishing the book, I posted questions in a few of the interracial romance groups on Facebook. I explained that this book was the third in the series, and the character of Chelsea had become known to readers in Books 1 and 2, so her story came about organically. I wanted to know what they liked and what they didn't like in the books they read. This is what I posted, and these were some of the comments I received. Names have been removed to protect the privacy of the commenters. "I have a question for the readers in the group. I noticed that most of the IR romances I see are WM/BW. At the moment I'm working on Book 3 in my series which features a character from Book 2, a white woman involved with a black man. Of course, this isn't anything new in our community, but I'd like to know what you'd love or hate to see in a BM/WW romance. Are there any things I should avoid? Please be honest. I REALLY need to know before I get too far into this story. Thank you!”* * * * * * *
"As long as he is not abusive I don't see any problem. I know this is not a problem in your work."
"In my own understanding, IR means the main characters are from different races. The sub-genre of IR are many; BW/WM, BM/WW etc.
From my own personal experience as an authors, readers prefer to see a BM on the cover rather than a white woman.
What do I hate as a reader? The excess focus on race as if that's the only thing the book is. We should grasp the whole racial thing as the story unfolds, not the main focus as if it is forced down our throats.
"However, be prepared that you may get flack from some readers who think IR is only BWWM."
"You are absolutely right. However, many readers have a very narrow definition of what constitutes IR romance. I've read comments from readers who claim that only BWWM is IR--the rest, according to them, is multicultural. I don't agree with them, but that is how many readers think. I've also read comments from readers on Goodreads who say they are not interested in reading about black men falling in love with white women because they already see this "in real life" whereas, for them, BWWM is the fantasy. Again, I don't agree with them, but this is what I've read in groups on Goodreads.
"As long as he is not derogatory towards black women. That's more common than a white man with a black woman.
"I think the same rules apply, too many times BM/WW books are treated as a fetish instead of Romance. The woman is black curious and then at the end might be surprised they care about this creature or oddity. My men are educated, not thugs because I hate that stereotype for black men. Treat it as you would a WMBW romance. That’s what I do for all of mine. The skin color only affects the outside world looking in but the relationship is the safe bubble where all that matters is how the people involved treat each other."
"Personally, I don't mind a long as the characters are real and well-developed. It would be refreshing to read. I prefer bwwm, only because that's how I began my journey. I'd like to believe that I am somewhat open-minded (not fully), as long as the supporting characters are not cast in a negative light. You know, the stereotypical "black bitch". I hope this helps. This comes from years of reading."
"Just make it realistic."
"I would like to see her willing to get know his family without being overly afraid. Apprehensive perhaps, but not terrified. I would also like to see her stand up for herself and be a partner to him. The two of them ride or die without going over the top."
"Just have fun with it. In one of mine the brother brought home a ww. Mom's reaction was 'Please tell me your son did NOT just bring me home a white girl.' This she said to her own white husband. LOL! Ppl will always have something negative to say, so don't let that worry you. Just write what you'd like to read."
"I'm invested in your character so as long as you stay true to Chelsea and her bohemian ways, it will be fine."
"In real life I have no issues with it. But I wouldn't read it."
"I'm all for IR romances, but I hate reading scenes where there's a racist family or friend. I went through that, and when I read a book, I want to escape the reality...."
"I never buy the WW/BM books!"
"Honestly, I wouldn't read it either and no offense but its because I can't dream or envisions myself vicariously in the story as the heroine. It's why I stay with BWWM."
* * * * * *
I guess I should've paid more attention to the negative comments than the positive ones, because this book bombed! It had probably one-quarter of the amount of sales I normally have in the first forty-five days after release.
I was so outdone, I went to my online writer's group to get their take on it.
* * * * * *"To be added to my "Never Do That Again" list - writing a book with a black hero and white heroine. Sales of YOU KNOW HOW TO LOVE ME aren't even half of what I normally sell of a new release in the first 45 days. :( Even though the story came about organically from the previous book in the series, apparently black women refuse to read about the BM/WW pairing. They're okay with a white hero and black heroine, though. #Weird #History #LessonLearned"These were some of the author comments:
"I don’t think it’s a matter of can’t. They just don’t want to. If they are avid romance readers they are probably done reading about white women getting their HEA."
"Yeah, successful black men dating and marrying white women is a sensitive subject for a lot black women.
"I know there are black women who will and have read white women written by white women but turn their noses at black women who write white women, it doesn't bother me. Especially if the black author also writes a healthy balance of black women. I hope their ethnicity is clear but even when I've clearly described a character, some one manages to feel it is ambiguous, which it never is. My cover will usually show the woman."
"I think I'm a bit sadistic. I loved watching that pale heroine grovel and adjust. Lmao. It was epic. But, she got her HEA and worked hard for it. Lmao"
"That might be what it is. They sad and desperate. OMGosh, that sounds like me. Desperate. I don't read contemporary romance with white women. They have options."
"I know all white women don't live charmed lives. I'm an admin for a special needs mom group that's 95% white. They struggle, but to answer your question, no. It's been more than 25 or so years since I've cared about a white woman being happy."
"I was thinking that would fail. Sorry. I have zero interest in reading that. Sorry it didn't work, Chicki."
"This is so interesting to me. For me, I just love a good story that keeps me engaged. I've had a YA novel idea tugging at me for a minute, where the BW is torn between a BM & WM. Now it makes me wonder...."
"It might work for YA though. That market is still hopeful about race relations."
"The younger generation isn't as bitter, and they might have no problem with it."
"There was an interracial romance as one of the story lines in my book that developed organically. But I was careful to draw my readers in and not set up expectations or reasons why they should reject the book before reading it, bc it was really about a woman’s internal journey & the romance with her white Co-worker who was her only work ally was just a side development that added complexity to the story and actually made the characters deal with the subject of racism. The cover and intro to the story didn’t set people up to unfairly make assumptions about my story or the characters. Unfortunately your cover likely did you in, not the story itself. Folks likely made assumptions based on the cover rather than the cover opening up questions they wanted to find answers to. With more controversial subject matter, sometimes we have to go subtle in our marketing so people won’t close themselves to the essence of a story they would likely enjoy if they gave it a chance."
"I wonder if your sales would have been higher if the cover was different and/or you had marketed this book to white women. Black women don't necessarily want to read about a white woman and a black man, but white women who fantasize about such things would. In marketing to white women, I think you would have had to change the cover though."
"You actually don’t have to do that. Just market it in a way that your targeted audience won’t reject it before reading it. Trust me - I’ve done well writing a diverse array of characters, though my protagonists are always Black women. Think about Silence of the Lambs - as much as people were repulsed by Hannibal Lechter, they were riveted by him and actually liked him. If they weren’t subtle and enticing in their marketing, folks wouldn’t have been as willing to engage with the story. But once they engaged, they were all in. Folks will accept and savor what you write if you give it to them honestly and in a way that connects with their humanity - and if your marketing doesn’t lead them to negative assumptions. Last analogy - I didn’t expect to enjoy Hidden Figures bc the ads were so hokey - saw it only bc I would feel guilty not to support it. And it was excellent, not just bc I related to it, but also from a storytelling, acting, production perspective as well. It fully deserved to be in the best picture race - and from a writing perspective was better than La La Land and Moonlight, the two front runners. But I easily could have missed seeing it bc the marketing didn’t compel me and led me to make false assumptions about the worthiness of the story."
"I just hate for any writer to censor their own work - what I meant by that earlier comment had nothing to do with your content. The negative assumption I was referring to is that black women may think they don’t want to read about the romance portrayed but once they start reading it really like the book. Though if that wasn’t your experience - if they panned it after reading it rather than just rejecting it outright bc they assumed they didn’t like it, I suppose it’s up to you as to whether you want to bend to popular whims or just write what you feel like writing. Sometimes writers bring people along in their thinking and expand people’s minds. But if it’s a purely numbers calculation on how you want to spend your time and resources, I suppose you have to weigh that as a factor."
"Remember Harper Lee didn’t win friends in her hometown writing To Kill A Mockingbird. She ended up bringing a whole lot of southern readers along in their thinking."
CB: "I was hoping to do that, but if people don't buy the book they won't get to read the story. LOL!
"I spent yesterday looking up WW/BM novels yesterday and guess what I found: mess! The one that stands out the most was this book about a white woman who worked in loss prevention and intentionally framed black men for theft they didn’t commit so she could trick them into sleeping with her to get off. It’s the way they ogle our men and think up SICK mess like that that I can’t stand. And it’s the way I see black men constantly leave and DEBASE black women and then go choose white women. And I see these same white women go on to further debase black women and make them feel even more worthless because they were chosen and we were not. Real life. I’ve read these exchanges and it makes me sick....
So it’s not a bitterness. It’s not that we don’t want to see white women happy. We don’t care because while they’re out there being happy, a lot of black women are still finding their own. And that’s why I personally feel triggered by stories about that."
"For whatever it's worth, I think you were very brave to write/promote this, Chicki and I admired you for it. There's was no question in my mind that it would be a well written and engaging story but the fact that you went out on a limb was courageous. I one clicked because of that as much as the writing."
Wow! I just wish my dear author friends had given me a heads up during the six month that I was writing and promoting the book before it was released.
There have been a few reviews that made me smile, though. This is one of them.
5.0 out of 5 stars Beautifully written
January 8, 2019
Format: Kindle EditionI love how the author gives us inside in the mind of a white girl . I must admit that I sometimes despise a brother with a good job choosing a white girl instead of a sister. But once I read this book it gave me another mindset at the end of the day you're choosing who you love no matter the skin color. Thanks for opening my eyes." - IAB74
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